# depression



## oldmurph58 (Feb 8, 2014)

read a lot of posts by self proclaimed experts over the weekend, so thought i'd weigh in. depression means sad. at the nursing home, almost all the people are sad. the old folks that live there are sad. families dont visit 90% of the time. they have been abandoned by the kids they raised, are sick, and call it "the boneyard". they are not stupid. they know its the end of the line. The staff who work with them, are sad too. we feel sad for them. we hold their hands when they die, every week. i have seen more death than almost any of you will ever see. good people, its a tragedy, but its nature. almost all human"s are afraid to die.if you say you are not, you are full of stuff. even if they say "im going home" they are afraid. and it break's our hearts, too see it, day in, day out. as for anti depressants they dont get anyone high. only the truely stupid do not know this. these folks are not weak or crazy. a anti depressant helps people cope with a terrible feeling of saddness.If you want to rant about "weak" people i suggest you go to a a.a. meating or survivors support group, and do it there. when you regain conciencness, you wont be so quick to shoot off your big mouths about stuff you dont know, and the word "weak" will come out of you limited vocabularies. i kno i cant spell and use run on sentances and this is probably the wrong forum too. But i hope my position is clear on this issue. those of you with the class, that supported the poor suffering depressed folks and addicts this weekend. god bless you.


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## MrsInor (Apr 15, 2013)

Good message oldmurph.


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## Silverback (Jan 20, 2014)

Man old murph killing me, 

A Short quick death is better than a long one. I say this because our society looses interest. My parents both of them passed around family and loved ones, my dad unexpected in a valley in my older sisters home with his wife at his side, grandkids and daughter in the home he was in. Happy and full filled. My mother a month later whom when I got the call I grabbed both my boys my little sister, rented a car and drove across two states so fast I made it minutes before her dying breath with ALL of her family there to say goodbye. There could not have been a better way for them to go.

When I went thru my incident in August where my survival was speculative, I saw all my family, my kids and my friends all passed through and stayed with me the days before the surgery.

Now say I was fighting a year long cancer that was slow. In time friends family, loved ones would lose interest. They would forget about me and my fight to live. Thats not hate,anger. That is just human nature. Sadly, it's Sad to those who are still fighting the long fight. Find strength in each other.

I hope that when I go, it is fast. That is why we say a short well lived life, is better than a long one. While not all inclusive, I would say it would just be easier to go out in a meaningful bang.


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## Denton (Sep 18, 2012)

My folks are oooold - to me. In their 80s. My brother passed a few years ago from a heart attack. He was seven years older than me. We were their only two offspring.

It is my intention to do whatever it takes to insure they stay in their home - across the street from mine. Yet another way this kid breaks from today's culture; I see elders as ones who deserve respect and should be revered and honored. They should never be tossed aside for death to take them in such a lonely manner, and people like ol' Murph should not have to be placed in such a disheartening position.

Thanks, Murph, for standing in the gap. You are a champ.

Now, about your run-on sentences, lack of punctuation and forgetfulness regarding capitalization...you get a pass, today. Your point was too good to worry about presentation.


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## Ripon (Dec 22, 2012)

Good luck Denton.

The one thing I got out of my "failed" business was that my dad was able to come by every day and spend some time with me there. He liked that I know he did. Like my mom and my inlaws (who I was close too) they also suffered short endings. My dads was about 3 weeks, my father in laws just one. Our mom's (wifes and mine) had it rougher - about 6 months of kemo /radiation stuff each trying to extend their lives to no avail. Still in the greater scheme of things 6 months is short compared to those in nursing homes with no one around and just passing time. I'm glad my parents didn't have that, it'd have broken my heart. My pop died on the last day of March I think it was, and in February (just 4 years ago) we played golf. I remember when the surgeon said they couldn't operate on him due to his health and asked if he had been healthy - I said the guy just shot a 82 at Pebble Beach and he's 85 years old! The surgeon wanted to operate but admitted even so - he'd never make it.



Denton said:


> My folks are oooold - to me. In their 80s. My brother passed a few years ago from a heart attack. He was seven years older than me. We were their only two offspring.
> 
> It is my intention to do whatever it takes to insure they stay in their home - across the street from mine. Yet another way this kid breaks from today's culture; I see elders as ones who deserve respect and should be revered and honored. They should never be tossed aside for death to take them in such a lonely manner, and people like ol' Murph should not have to be placed in such a disheartening position.
> 
> ...


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## paraquack (Mar 1, 2013)

When my mother was in the nursing home about 100 miles from me, I found it hard to get to see her. Distance was always a problem, so was dealing with my siblings who lived a miles away. The hardest part of seeing my mother was the knowledge that see was no longer the vibrant woman who raised me. Going into the room and seeing the tired old woman she'd become tore my heart to shreds. After spending a couple of hours with her, I'd sit in my car and cry like a damn kid all over again. Some it would be 15 minutes, a few times it was over an hour. As much as I miss her, as much as I cried when I got the word of her passing, I knew she was in a better place.


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## retired guard (Mar 7, 2013)

We all want to go to a better place. However we sometimes find the path there daunting.


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## PaulS (Mar 11, 2013)

Dad died young and mom outlived him by 35 years. She raised the remaining 6 kids (6 had already grown and left) and stayed alive until she was 87 years old. She lost most of her vision and lived with family right up to the day she died. She was happy and healthy right up to the point where she could no longer do anything. I spent her last year on this earth talking, taking short walks, expressing and accepting the love we shared. I cooked her favorite meals and fixed treats when she wanted them. Her biggest regret was not being able to leave each of her 12 kids a million dollars when she died. I told her that those who needed it would be back in debt in a year and those of us who didn't need it didn't care to have it. I constantly reminded her that she had raised us all and had done a great job - not one of the twelve were crazy or in jail - and we laughed about that. In that last week I told her that when she needed to go it would be all right. We were a family and we would stay together no matter what. We told each other that we loved and though I still miss her now and then I never felt the need to grieve for any loss. In many ways I still feel connected to her and I know she is happy. She died listening to the laughter of her children getting along like we always do. I was blessed to share that last year with her and I will treasure her as the saint she was.


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## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

I have not seen the posts, about these experts, but I can say, I suffer from depression. I take medication. It was so "f-ing hard" to tell a doctor I needed help.
Mental issues, for me, are the hardest things to be open about. 
I dont know the whole story, I will read the posts from the weekend, but OldMurph, I thank you. I am thankfull for people like you, BROTHER. 
If ANYONE, ever needs to reach out, DO IT. You think your alone, that no one understands, but I promise you, someone else is having the same issue, and could really benefit from knowing they arent alone also.
I am no expert, but I listen well.


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## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

oldmurph58 said:


> read a lot of posts by self proclaimed experts over the weekend, so thought i'd weigh in. depression means sad. at the nursing home, almost all the people are sad. the old folks that live there are sad. families dont visit 90% of the time. they have been abandoned by the kids they raised, are sick, and call it "the boneyard". they are not stupid. they know its the end of the line. The staff who work with them, are sad too. we feel sad for them. we hold their hands when they die, every week. i have seen more death than almost any of you will ever see. good people, its a tragedy, but its nature. almost all human"s are afraid to die.if you say you are not, you are full of stuff. even if they say "im going home" they are afraid. and it break's our hearts, too see it, day in, day out. as for anti depressants they dont get anyone high. only the truely stupid do not know this. these folks are not weak or crazy. a anti depressant helps people cope with a terrible feeling of saddness.If you want to rant about "weak" people i suggest you go to a a.a. meating or survivors support group, and do it there. when you regain conciencness, you wont be so quick to shoot off your big mouths about stuff you dont know, and the word "weak" will come out of you limited vocabularies. i kno i cant spell and use run on sentances and this is probably the wrong forum too. But i hope my position is clear on this issue. those of you with the class, that supported the poor suffering depressed folks and addicts this weekend. god bless you.


I would watch my grandfather read the paper everyday, and most days he would say" well, so and so died today, I remember picking cotton with him", or " I remember her from high school". Too see "the reality" of everyone around him passing away, was something that broke my heart


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## budgetprepp-n (Apr 7, 2013)

I took care of my father 27-7 for the last seven years of his life. He was 86 when he died. When I first started watching
him he was a heck of a proud man. WWII battle vet. Well decorated. I became his best friend and fishing partner (rainbow trout).
When he passed away he was in dippers and didn't know who I was. I burred him wearing his favorite fishing shirt and hat.
I left in his best rod and reel, A pack of smokes and plenty of power bait. My Dad never liked a fancy car so we draped 
the flag on his coffin and put bungee strap around the bottom and took him up out the mountain for the last time in the
back of a pick up truck. I think he liked it. Anyways,,,Some times he would get very depressed but the medication he 
took helped him quite a bit. I was thankful for his meds. 

After the services I found out that some people were really upset about the cigarettes and using a truck instead of a
hearse. I didn't loose my cool I thought a long time about what my Dad would say and in his honor I said,
"You need to gain the knowledge of life before you judge the dress of death" 
Then the ******* in me kicked in and I added "And you can kiss my ass" 

How do I fight depression? I get over self medicated and wright about what I am thinking sometimes
Like just now


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## Montana Rancher (Mar 4, 2013)

oldmurph58 said:


> read a lot of posts by self proclaimed experts over the weekend, so thought i'd weigh in. depression means sad. at the nursing home, almost all the people are sad. the old folks that live there are sad. families dont visit 90% of the time. they have been abandoned by the kids they raised, are sick, and call it "the boneyard". they are not stupid. they know its the end of the line. The staff who work with them, are sad too. we feel sad for them. we hold their hands when they die, every week. i have seen more death than almost any of you will ever see. good people, its a tragedy, but its nature. almost all human"s are afraid to die.if you say you are not, you are full of stuff. even if they say "im going home" they are afraid. and it break's our hearts, too see it, day in, day out. as for anti depressants they dont get anyone high. only the truely stupid do not know this. these folks are not weak or crazy. a anti depressant helps people cope with a terrible feeling of saddness.If you want to rant about "weak" people i suggest you go to a a.a. meating or survivors support group, and do it there. when you regain conciencness, you wont be so quick to shoot off your big mouths about stuff you dont know, and the word "weak" will come out of you limited vocabularies. i kno i cant spell and use run on sentances and this is probably the wrong forum too. But i hope my position is clear on this issue. those of you with the class, that supported the poor suffering depressed folks and addicts this weekend. god bless you.


Here is my opinion

If you want to make a case do this..

1. Learn how to punctuate, it will expand your mind and make your thoughts more cohesive

2. Learn how to capitalize words, and refer to rule 1

3. Learn what a paragraph is, and refer to rule number 1.

4. Learn what spell check is, were you born in a barn?

Truthfully I didn't read your diatribe as it seems written like a 9 year old, did you go to school?

If you want people to take you seriously then you need to act like an adult with punctuation, grammar, spelling and FINALLY content.


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## budgetprepp-n (Apr 7, 2013)

Montana Rancher said:


> Here is my opinion
> 
> If you want to make a case do this..
> 
> ...


Oh,,Ouch I think you to talk to someone,,,,,I thought it was a good post 
I say go for it I can read it I can't speel to well either.


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## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

Montana, I usually have your back, but I gotta call you out on this one. You need to slow down a second and read the whole post. Some people(myself) are very computer dumb.


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## Montana Rancher (Mar 4, 2013)

I am happy to read and reply to an reasonable post put up in English, but that isn't what was posted.

If you want to read and try to interpret the tripe that was first posted, knock yourself out.


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## budgetprepp-n (Apr 7, 2013)

Oh,, It must be red neck wrightin I understod it 

You boys stop right now or I'm going to turn this car around right now,,,,,,,,,,, I mean it.


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## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

budgetprepp-n said:


> I took care of my father 27-7 for the last seven years of his life. He was 86 when he died. When I first started watching
> him he was a heck of a proud man. WWII battle vet. Well decorated. I became his best friend and fishing partner (rainbow trout).
> When he passed away he was in dippers and didn't know who I was. I burred him wearing his favorite fishing shirt and hat.
> I left in his best rod and reel, A pack of smokes and plenty of power bait. My Dad never liked a fancy car so we draped
> ...


Budget, brother, I knew I liked you for some reason.


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## rickkyw1720pf (Nov 17, 2012)

When I die I wan't to just die quickly like my grandfather, not scream and hollering like the other 4 people in his car.


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## oldmurph58 (Feb 8, 2014)

"Silver has been going up 20% a day for the last 3 days

Gold for those that are "old school" is also rising

IMO get you excess cash into silver, in the next 4x weeks you will make you fortune

In know I've only been posting about solar panels, raising goats and such, but this is going to go bad really fast, if you own silver (even 10 ounces will make a difference) IMO it is on the edge of collapse" how many mis spelled words and missing periods can you find class? Montana rancher, is this your post or am i messin up?


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## rice paddy daddy (Jul 17, 2012)

oldmurph, I can identify with what you said. When my Mom got to be 89 and was living alone in South Florida, the hurricane season of 2004 was bad, but 2005 was devastating. She lived without electricity for 2 weeks. I was 300 miles away and it broke my heart, so we moved her up to an assisted living facility nearby.
Either my wife or I would visit nearly every day, but there were women there whose children lived nearby and never visited. You used the word "sad" and that it was - very sad.
Mom's with Jesus now, but I have seen what awaits most of us. And it's not pretty.

Montana Rancher - not all of us may have your level of education or writing skills. I'm just an old truck driver who barely graduated high school and never went to college, so maybe that helps me overlook some of the writing I see here on this board.


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## oldmurph58 (Feb 8, 2014)

Montana Rancher said:


> I am happy to read and reply to an reasonable post put up in English, but that isn't what was posted.
> 
> If you want to read and try to interpret the tripe that was first posted, knock yourself out.


 The easiest thing you could do is just stick me on your ignore list.


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## Notsoyoung (Dec 2, 2013)

Montana Rancher said:


> Here is my opinion
> 
> If you want to make a case do this..
> 
> ...


Here is my opinion, someone who can read this and their only reply is to complain about punctuation, capitalization, and grammar is a flaming rectal passage.


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## Notsoyoung (Dec 2, 2013)

Montana Rancher said:


> I am happy to read and reply to an reasonable post put up in English, but that isn't what was posted.
> 
> If you want to read and try to interpret the tripe that was first posted, knock yourself out.


Please learn when to use "a" and "an". If you can't post in proper English then you shouldn't post at all. Emphasis on YOU.


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## PaulS (Mar 11, 2013)

Montana Rancher said:


> I am happy to read and reply to an reasonable post put up in English, but that isn't what was posted.
> 
> If you want to read and try to interpret the tripe that was first posted, knock yourself out.


Montana Rancher,
If you are going to be the grammar and punctuation police then you need to do some educating of yourself.

I am happy to read and reply to *a* reasonable post*, *put up in English, but that isn't what was posted.
If you want to read and try to interpret the tripe that was first posted*(, not required)* knock yourself out.

Those who live in glass houses....


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## rickkyw1720pf (Nov 17, 2012)

http://farahzulkifly.files.wordpress.com/2012/09/can-you-read-this.jpg


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## Notsoyoung (Dec 2, 2013)

One thing to bear in mind, depression is not always caused by being sad. It is a fact that it is often caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain and can be alleviated by medication. By the way, both Abraham Lincoln and Winston Churchill suffered from depression. They both seemed to be able to stumble through life despite suffering from it.


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## PaulS (Mar 11, 2013)

To fight "clinical depression" stay active with folks you like and share common interests. Force yourself to be engaged in life and find a way to be creative.

For deep, long term, depression seek help. The anti-depressants are only part of the treatment. You still need to find a way to enjoy life. Outdoor activities, games, comedies, and your faith can all be treatment to accompany the drugs to make you better. 

People die because they no longer wish to live so get to it! Live your life to the fullest.


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## oldmurph58 (Feb 8, 2014)

PaulS said:


> To fight "clinical depression" stay active with folks you like and share common interests. Force yourself to be engaged in life and find a way to be creative.
> 
> For deep, long term, depression seek help. The anti-depressants are only part of the treatment. You still need to find a way to enjoy life. Outdoor activities, games, comedies, and your faith can all be treatment to accompany the drugs to make you better.
> 
> People die because they no longer wish to live so get to it! Live your life to the fullest.


 i'm with you 100% on that brother. I am at the low end of the spectrum as far as nursing education goes, so I tried to keep things to my own life experiences. There are a lot of things the docs can do to help depressed folks. Thanks to everyone who stuck up for me.Even denton gave me a pass for content, he coulda been a hard marker if he was a teacher. lol only kiddin i like you denton, you too PaulS


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## PaulS (Mar 11, 2013)

oldmurph,

You aren't old enough but you remind me of my mother's dad. He had an attitude that everyone was pretty much OK except for some folks who thought they were somehow better. He lost a leg in his youth but never let it slow him down. I didn't even know he had an artificial leg until grandma told him to stop sticking the knife in his leg between uses. I just though he was that tough. He could blacksmith, fish, hunt, and even keep that old single cylinder outboard running. I wish I had been mature enough to have learned more from him.

Anyway, your attitude matches his a bit. Thanks for being here.


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## retired guard (Mar 7, 2013)

Deebo said:


> I have not seen the posts, about these experts, but I can say, I suffer from depression. I take medication. It was so "f-ing hard" to tell a doctor I needed help.
> Mental issues, for me, are the hardest things to be open about.
> I dont know the whole story, I will read the posts from the weekend, but OldMurph, I thank you. I am thankfull for people like you, BROTHER.
> If ANYONE, ever needs to reach out, DO IT. You think your alone, that no one understands, but I promise you, someone else is having the same issue, and could really benefit from knowing they arent alone also.
> I am no expert, but I listen well.


I'm also often depressed. Self medicate but I'm not very good at it. Some day I'll figure it out till then one foot in front of the other.


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## Scotty12 (Jan 5, 2013)

oldmurph58 I think you got your point across in a clear and concise manner. Good job.


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## oldmurph58 (Feb 8, 2014)

Scotty12 said:


> oldmurph58 I think you got your point across in a clear and concise manner. Good job.


 thanks doc, i'm just a l.p.n. but i was trying


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## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

oldmurph, I dont know what my baby sister is namewise, I just know she's a nurse, and I know she comes home and just cries. Please, Know that I love and respect yall. NO WAY, could I deal with life and death everyday. I just cant. I am too emootional. I have sat here and written a paragraph, cried, erased it, and typed this one. THANK YOU, thank all the nurses where you are.


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## Schramm (Feb 9, 2014)

Here is my opinion,
If you want to make a case do this..(only one period)

1. Learn how to punctuate, it will expand your mind and make your thoughts more cohesive.

2. Learn how to capitalize words, and refer to rule 1.

3. Learn what a paragraph is, and refer to rule number 1.

4. Learn what spell check is, were you born in a barn?

Truthfully, I didn't read your diatribe as it seemsto be written like a 9 year old, did you go to school?


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## MrsInor (Apr 15, 2013)

Note to self - add Schramm to the grammar Nazi list.


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## Scotty12 (Jan 5, 2013)

Yeah... and take College Comp I and II while you're at it That was kind of rude Schramm


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## inceptor (Nov 19, 2012)

Schramm said:


> Truthfully, I didn't read your diatribe as it *seemsto be* written like a 9 year old, did you go to school?





MrsInor said:


> Note to self - add Schramm to the grammar Nazi list.


Yup, and did ya notice the words running together? THAT'S why normally proofread. :lol:


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## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

bacon


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## MrsInor (Apr 15, 2013)

turtle


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## inceptor (Nov 19, 2012)

MrsInor said:


> turtle


Uh, no capital letter, no punctuation and no sentence structure. 

Ve vill have to vatch you! ::rambo::


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## Schramm (Feb 9, 2014)

Sorry, if you found it rude, but all I was trying to point out that he was trying to correct the OP and I found it rude the way he did it, so I was just correcting his own post... if you look at my posts, (pretty much any of them) they are far from correct. I depend heavily on spell check and auto correct for correct spelling and even grammar... Its the whole teach what you preach thing... I read the OP's post just find, thought it had a great message and didn't deserve that kind of treatment.

side note I caught those words running together as I had hit the post button. I was just too lazy to go back and fix it. I figured s/he'd get the point... Oh and I had thought I had quoted it but I guess I pushed the wrong button.


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## inceptor (Nov 19, 2012)

Schramm said:


> Sorry, if you found it rude, but all I was trying to point out that he was trying to correct the OP and I found it rude the way he did it, so I was just correcting his own post... if you look at my posts, (pretty much any of them) they are far from correct. I depend heavily on spell check and auto correct for correct spelling and even grammar... Its the whole teach what you preach thing... I read the OP's post just find, thought it had a great message and didn't deserve that kind of treatment.
> 
> side note I caught those words running together as I had hit the post button. I was just too lazy to go back and fix it. I figured s/he'd get the point... Oh and I had thought I had quoted it but I guess I pushed the wrong button.


Rude, no. Funny, yes. I am not a grammar Nazi. (although you couldn't tell by my earlier accent) I rely heavily on spell check as I just did in the last sentence. :lol: I also have proofreading as a backup but even then I miss things. The problem I see with me pointing a finger is that the other 3 are pointing at me.

Around here you have to maintain your sense of humor, ours can be strange at times.


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## tango (Apr 12, 2013)

My grand parents, my mother, were never "in a home".
They lived out their lives in there homes, and had the care they needed.
I only hope I can do the same.


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