# Naked and Afraid



## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

Inspired by "Naked and Afraid"
If I went I would take a spade
But only if I was paid,
And the chance of getting laid.

I would dig a hole in the ground
And myself with leaves surround
Covered in branches I had found
Then sleep snug safe and sound.

A Dakota fire hole to keep me warm,
And to chase away the swarm,
With my partner in my dorm,
I wouldn't fear the storm.

But here's my question to y'all
Because I'm a noob, with no skills at all,
I want a Dakota pit into which to crawl,
A really deep pit with a one yard fall.

I plan to sleep in the air hole,
My feet almost on the coal
I would cover the fire with a bowl,
And be snug there as a mole.

A Dakota pit with one hole shut,
I think it would make a cozy hut
The rest would be filled with my Wingnut
Or is my thinking in a rut.


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## TwoTimeTim (Jul 3, 2018)

Wingnut said:


> Inspired by "Naked and Afraid"
> If I went I would take a spade
> But only if I was paid,
> And the chance of getting laid.
> ...


What if it started raining and you could drowned in a hole.


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## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

TwoTimeTim said:


> What if it started raining and you could drowned in a hole.


The fire would be covered from the hail, 
Or if it really poured I would have to bail.


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## The Tourist (Jun 9, 2016)

Oh, you're not the only one who has tried to be funny in prose.

My wife likes "The Sound of Music." Obviously, I don't. There is a song they sing called "Edelweiss," for which I wrote:

Anal wipes, anal wipes,
for over eating and drinking.
Soft and light, anal wipes
They're for hemorrhoidal shrinking...


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## A Watchman (Sep 14, 2015)

TwoTimeTim said:


> What if it started raining and you could drowned in a hole.


You got any of that stuff for sale?


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## TwoTimeTim (Jul 3, 2018)

A Watchman said:


> You got any of that stuff for sale?


I'm not sure what your talking about I'm a bus driver. We are talking about staying warm with a camp fire maybe you posted on the wrong topic I've done that before.


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## patrioteer (May 21, 2018)

Naked & Afraid? Isn't that the name of Maxine Waters gynecological clinic?


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## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

If one has the latest prepping tools, and a well stocked bugout bunker, I am sure one could have a wonderful doomsday.

That is why I have a morbid fascination for Naked and Afraid, where they just have their wits and a few survival tools.
To me it seems that food is not the biggest problem for 21 days, even though they lose so much weight that their lifestyle is clearly not sustainable. 
The biggest tapout factor seems to be them getting cold and wet and hypothermic. Which makes me pull my hair out. Can these survivalists, over 21 days not make a waterproof shelter?

I am attracted to underground. If one has to bugout it should be in a dugout.

What do you think of the idea of living in a trench covered with branches? 
Or better still, I would make a Dakota fire hole, enlarge the air hole, so that my legs could fit in it with my feet close to the fire. I would shape the ground like a seat so I don't slide into the fire. And firewood has to be under shelter as much as humans. Best yet, I would do as hominids did and find a cave to be home sweet home. I see Naked and Afraid participants walk past caves and rock overhangs all the time, so one cannot say these are not available.

So my dugout tool would be a spade sharpened on the edges to chop wood. And I would take a magnifying glass to make fire. I have managed to make fire with bow and drill, but this method is a pig.

Thank you for any future comments on bugging out in a dugout with next to no equipment.


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## StratMaster (Dec 26, 2017)

Wingnut said:


> If one has the latest prepping tools, and a well stocked bugout bunker, I am sure one could have a wonderful doomsday.
> 
> That is why I have a morbid fascination for Naked and Afraid, where they just have their wits and a few survival tools.
> To me it seems that food is not the biggest problem for 21 days, even though they lose so much weight that their lifestyle is clearly not sustainable.
> ...


You can easily resolve this for yourself. Go out into the wilderness in the wintertime and try to stay a week in a branch covered trench.
Bring a snorkel.


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## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

StratMaster said:


> You can easily resolve this for yourself. Go out into the wilderness in the wintertime and try to stay a week in a branch covered trench.
> Bring a snorkel.


Did I mention I like to _watch_ Naked and Afraid, not _be_ Naked and Afraid?


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## Lowtechredneck (May 7, 2018)

Wingnut said:


> If one has the latest prepping tools, and a well stocked bugout bunker, I am sure one could have a wonderful doomsday.
> 
> That is why I have a morbid fascination for Naked and Afraid, where they just have their wits and a few survival tools.
> To me it seems that food is not the biggest problem for 21 days, even though they lose so much weight that their lifestyle is clearly not sustainable.
> ...


That would work well in a dry climate. Where I live, except in a few dry summer months, you can not dig 2' down without water oozing into the hole. If you dig a post hole and leave it overnight, the next morning it will have a foot of water in the bottom. Except for the hottest part of summer, but this year we are having a rainy summer. I guess my point is it depends on the area you are in.


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## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

Lowtechredneck said:


> That would work well in a dry climate. Where I live, except in a few dry summer months, you can not dig 2' down without water oozing into the hole. If you dig a post hole and leave it overnight, the next morning it will have a foot of water in the bottom. Except for the hottest part of summer, but this year we are having a rainy summer. I guess my point is it depends on the area you are in.


Where I live you can dig down 9' and still not hit water. But I suppose it depends on which horrid place the producers of Naked and Afraid send one. If the water table was high, and the nights cold, I would build up a trench by making 2 banks and then use a rocket stove, which is an above ground Dakota fire hole. Or I might fill the raised banks with sticks, set them on fire, then cover the sticks with leaves and then soil and sleep on the charcoal forming underneath.

In summary, I think it's easier to build with soil than sticks - a view supported by a child story about three pigs who build houses of straw, or brick and the wolf huffs and puffs and blows the straw house down.


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## Lowtechredneck (May 7, 2018)

I could take a single shovel full out of the ground right now and it would be full of water. That's why I believe in above ground sheltering around here.


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## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

Lowtechredneck said:


> I could take a single shovel full out of the ground right now and it would be full of water. That's why I believe in above ground sheltering around here.


Is your soil a clay? If so you have a building material. Or is it so wet because it is low lying? Would there be a raised area of land where one could dig a dugout?


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## Lowtechredneck (May 7, 2018)

This is the gulf coastal plain, it is pancake flat for miles and miles. It is mostly clay, what the old timers call gumbo. If you wear slip on boots, you will lose one in it at some point. The suction is incredible. You should see how hard it can hang onto a truck tire.


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## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

Lowtechredneck said:


> This is the gulf coastal plain, it is pancake flat for miles and miles. It is mostly clay, what the old timers call gumbo. If you wear slip on boots, you will lose one in it at some point. The suction is incredible. You should see how hard it can hang onto a truck tire.


It sounds to me that if one could make a weave of sticks and daub/plaster this with gumbo, perhaps even bake it in fire, one would have quite a good wall to shelter behind. My soil is sand, very easy to work as it just runs off the spade. One can even mix it with cement and it works fine. Water just drains straight through it. I am looking into biochar currently, and thinking of trying adding this to the soil.


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## Sasquatch (Dec 12, 2014)

There once was a Squatch from Nantucket.
Who if finished this limerick would have to ban himself....so suck it!


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## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

Sasquatch said:


> There once was a Squatch from Nantucket.
> Who if finished this limerick would have to ban himself....so suck it!


There was a Sasquatch from Nantucket
Who's career was going nowhere in a bucket
So he went to Hollywood
And there he did good
As the Wookiee, good luck he had struck it.


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## Wingnut (Jul 7, 2018)

Naked and Afraid participants are allowed to take with them one or two survival implements like a machete and a firefighter. But they take one other survival "tool". That is their mind/brain. This is their most important survival asset.

Some participants have refused to spoon with other participants for added heat, and have had to tap out due to hypothermia. Some participants start breaking down out of loneliness for their families after a few days. Some have lasted when I would have thought they should have tapped out due to intolerable conditions like cold, or being eaten alive by mosquitoes.

When the brown stuff hits the twirly thing, there will be no chance to tap out and go back to home and hearth. It will be survive or die.

I say that we need to be sharpening and honing our most important survival tool on a daily basis, and that is our minds. On a daily basis we have to be strict with what we allow into our heads. Thoughts are like acorns, which if watered grow into oaks. If we don't want oaks, deal with the sprouting acorns by weeding them out there and then. Thoughts of quitting or suicide have to be recognised and dealt with. As I said on another thread, I do not allow myself to watch horror or the paranormal, because I don't want to be afraid of the dark.

I remember this one Naked and Afraid episode, where the participants stated their fear of the paranormal. I knew right then that this would be an issue for them. And so it turned out. There are many animals in the wild which make ungodly noises, and if one is expecting ghosts, ghosts you shall have. And these folks got terrified some nights by ghostly apparitions, which were, to the camera and myself, just light patterns. But these lights and shadows terrified them.

We can be walking past resources and die for not recognising food or shelter. Here too the well prepared mind is our greatest asset. For instance, I would be turning over every rock and log looking for snakes/breakfast.

I would be collecting every dry leaf for mattresses/blankets/mosquito netting.

But then, I have never been where they have chosen to be so my hat off to all of them (worst and best) for at least stepping up to the plate.


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