# Centipedes and I think I'm doomed



## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

This forum is full of very brave and amazing people who discuss survival strategies and share valuable info, I don't think any of you would scream when seeing a bug with hundred legs and refuse to enter the room until the braver person of your household murders it ASAP.
I'm doomed... This is why I only Winter camp.


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

No sense of humor?


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## Smitty901 (Nov 16, 2012)

Well I knew a soldier that had no problem facing The other side even when it did not look good he would kill a snake cook and eat it.
See a spider and he freaked. We all have our issues.


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## 2Tim215 (Jun 19, 2014)

quint said:


> You cannot "murder" that which is not human. Murder is 'homicide, without justification". Homi meaning "our kind", the human species.


Is there a bridge somewhere nearby with something lurking underneath?


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Son 2 could kick your ass on the hockey rink, work all day in the sun, take shit from his old man and smile...but throw a fake garter snake at him and watch him squeal like quint.


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## 2Tim215 (Jun 19, 2014)

Bring a spider near me and I'll scream blue bloody murder whilst murdering it!!! Oh shit, can't murder a spider can you?


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## Derma-Redi (Aug 23, 2014)

In laymen terms she meant "SQUISH"...


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## 2Tim215 (Jun 19, 2014)

Big people can "squish" little people but we can't murder spiders? What's this world coming too?


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## Camel923 (Aug 13, 2014)

I used to make up critters that lived in the woods and I had the kids as well as my wife terrified of creatures like the dreaded Pennsylvania purple throated butt-licker, and the Laurel Highlands hoop snake while camping. Of course that was after they heard something and got an affirmative reply to the question of there being bears in the woods. It makes midnight restroom calls eventful.


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

I'm just killing this bottle of Captain Morgan Spiced Rum


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Camel923 said:


> I used to make up critters that lived in the woods and I had the kids as well as my wife terrified of creatures like the dreaded Pennsylvania purple throated butt-licker, and the Laurel Highlands hoop snake while camping. Of course that was after they heard something and got an affirmative reply to the question of there being bears in the woods. It makes midnight restroom calls eventful.


Purple-throated butt licker? I need another glass of wine haha


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Slippy said:


> I'm just killing this bottle of Captain Morgan Spiced Rum


Spiced rum is nice, I have Indian spiced rum


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

The Puerto Rican rum was cheaper last time. So it was rum and coke.


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

I skipped church today so I can beat all the hyprocrits to the liquor store. So I'm getting ready for the NASCAR race tonight and Mrs Slippy, who attended church to pray for her sinful husband, notices that the bottle of Captain Morgan that I opened last night is damn near empty. Before she can say anything, I accuse her and Son 1 (who is hanging out with us this weekend) of drinking my Captain Morgan. They are flustered and deny it. I turn and smile. The dogs just look at me. 

And that's how my Sunday goes....


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Slippy said:


> I skipped church today so I can beat all the hyprocrits to the liquor store. So I'm getting ready for the NASCAR race tonight and Mrs Slippy, who attended church to pray for her sinful husband, notices that the bottle of Captain Morgan that I opened last night is damn near empty. Before she can say anything, I accuse her and Son 1 (who is hanging out with us this weekend) of drinking my Captain Morgan. They are flustered and deny it. I turn and smile. The dogs just look at me.
> 
> And that's how my Sunday goes....


haha I'm enjoying my last Sunday alone, my husband is training for his next triathlon and my kids are at grandmas until tomorrow. Enjoying my Malbec


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## Camel923 (Aug 13, 2014)

I'm taking my Heine (Heineken) out to the barn and see what I can get into. My wife and daughter hate it when we are out and I ask the waitress for a little Heine.


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Slippy, you forgot to check the link I left you in the Prepper Nurse thread, has to do with your funeral/


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## paraquack (Mar 1, 2013)

Things may startle the snot out of me, but so far I haven't found the creepy crawler to renders me useless. Now the wife, well, snake is her Achilles heel.


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Camel923 said:


> I'm taking my Heine (Heineken) out to the barn and see what I can get into. My wife and daughter hate it when we are out and I ask the waitress for a little Heine.


Your poor wife, I'm sure she'll ask a male waiter for something equally heinous when you least expect it. This thread is really improving my English.


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## csi-tech (Apr 13, 2013)

I am cool with snakes and most insects. If I see a roach in my house I freak. And fleas, I hate fleas.


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## dannydefense (Oct 9, 2013)

The wife... bumble bees and roaches. She's out for the count, but only because she screamed herself unconscious.

On the other hand, we keep a couple tarantula's as pets, so it doesn't really make sense to me. It just is.


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## Arklatex (May 24, 2014)

I'm good with most critters. The two that get me are skunks and those giant flying roaches. They always seem to go right for the face.


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Arklatex said:


> ...giant flying roaches. They always seem to go right for the face.


AAAAA!!!!! Flying roaches is a nightmare for me, I saw one in Southern China in my hotel room.. where did you see flying roaches? I'll make sure to never ever go there haha


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## Arklatex (May 24, 2014)

They're all over the south. Yall don't have them up there?


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Arklatex said:


> They're all over the south. Yall don't have them up there?


No way, if there were flying roaches here, I'd move to Siberia, not a bad place to live


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

Must be too cold. Roaches like it hot.

There was a place I worked at that was once abandoned. In the Break room there was a microwave and behind the display glass were bugs. Some were molting. Couldn't tell you what they were but one of the coworkers but noodles in it after I saw something in there. Then something gets said and the mentally slow (sorry) cleaning lady comes in and cleans the microwave with a toilet brush. And I didn't say anything for a while because I felt bad? The microwave got thrown out anyway.


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## Arklatex (May 24, 2014)

And wet


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## Camel923 (Aug 13, 2014)

TorontoGal said:


> Your poor wife, I'm sure she'll ask a male waiter for something equally heinous when you least expect it. This thread is really improving my English.


No. She is way too proper for that. She will get me in some other way. After I have a couple of Heines my tongue loosens up and I really have to watch myself. I better watch what I am typing or I will get myself into some deep kimchi on this site.


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## Denton (Sep 18, 2012)

TorontoGal said:


> No way, if there were flying roaches here, I'd move to Siberia, not a bad place to live


Oh, yeah. I assure you, they are here. My wife will promise you. They piss me off, they flip her out. They piss me off because they flip her out.


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## SDF880 (Mar 28, 2013)

Snakes don't both me a bit pick em up and tie em in a knot, LOL. I hate spiders so I freaked a few years back when a house right down the street
was overrun with brown recluse spiders. The folks that lived there set traps and had counted 550+ spiders caught and that is when they abandoned the house.
The house sat empty for awhile then someone purchased it and put some big tent around it and blasted it with bug killer. I guess this worked as people live there again.
We get occasional spiders in our house but our 2 well trained killer attack tactical cats are usually all over the spiders.


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## dannydefense (Oct 9, 2013)

Seattle Man Burns Down House Trying to Kill Spider With Spray Paint - TIME

_Nobody can confirm if the spider survived or not._


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## Maine-Marine (Mar 7, 2014)

Snow Snakes have always frightened me...

On a serious note..a friend of mine..a pastor,,was over visiting and I walked to the woodshed I made from pallets to show him my labor...as I entered the shed a snake was just at eye level on the wood and the snake flipped its tale and took off... I jumped and swore...

My Pastor friend said, laughed and said.."You jumped like a little girl!"
I said "Yep, but I swore like a Marine!"


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## Gallo Pazzesco (Dec 22, 2012)

csi-tech said:


> I am cool with snakes and most insects. If I see a roach in my house I freak. And fleas, I hate fleas.


Somewhere in your family tree someone survived the bubonic plague ... and passed the fear of such things on to you genetically.

TotontoGal ... my very Southern wife and I were out far too late one night in NYC and she had a few too many and asked the bartender for a a ginger dick.

Unfortunately the young man was an Irish red head and before he could quit laughing I walked over to him and explained that down here in the South a popular drink among the girls is ginger ale and George Dickle bourbon ... more commonly referred to as a Dickle Ale. She was tipsy and mis-represented it - but you should have seen the look on that kid's face.


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## Gallo Pazzesco (Dec 22, 2012)

Arklatex said:


> I'm good with most critters. The two that get me are skunks and those giant flying roaches. They always seem to go right for the face.


We call the giant flying roaches down here "Palmetto bugs." Those little red Russian roaches ... now they are not cool at all - not in the least.


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## Inor (Mar 22, 2013)

I HATE snakes! I HATE THEM WITH A PASSION! Bugs and spiders, not so much.

Every few years we will get a mayfly hatch that is so bad they literally have to call out the snowplows to plow them off the bridges. Mrs Inor really hates that, me not so much. It is actually kind of cool to watch a big snowplow throw a 20 foot wake and realize it is all bugs!


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Red Russian roaches?


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

Ooooohhhh hell no!! Centipedes are terrifying!! Those little bastards are sooo fast! I believe they crawl down your throat while you sleep! hehe


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## Jeep (Aug 5, 2014)

Ok I'll confess. I scream like a girl if a spider surprises me


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

Inor said:


> I HATE snakes! I HATE THEM WITH A PASSION! Bugs and spiders, not so much.
> 
> Every few years we will get a mayfly hatch that is so bad they literally have to call out the snowplows to plow them off the bridges. Mrs Inor really hates that, me not so much. It is actually kind of cool to watch a big snowplow throw a 20 foot wake and realize it is all bugs!


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Mish said:


> Ooooohhhh hell no!! Centipedes are terrifying!! Those little bastards are sooo fast! I believe they crawl down your throat while you sleep! hehe


No no no no thank you


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

My 9 year-old daughter screamed and screamed when a centipede fell into her bathtub tonight, I tried very hard not to scream while helping her out of the bath. It's still swimming in there 1 hour later, just won't freaking die. My husband is not home, I need a plan B husband just for times like this.


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## Jeep (Aug 5, 2014)

FIRE, works everytime


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## dannydefense (Oct 9, 2013)

Jeep said:


> FIRE, works everytime


No, no it doesn't. See a few pages back!


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

It's still alive, I will never use that bathroom again...


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## Denton (Sep 18, 2012)

TorontoGal said:


> It's still alive, I will never use that bathroom again...


Oh, come on. Retrieve it with a paper towel and chunk it out the door!


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Denton said:


> Oh, come on. Retrieve it with a paper towel and chunk it out the door!


I'll wait for my husband to do this, it's still moving. I'm ok with snakes and scorpions but centipedes.... I just can't.


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## Denton (Sep 18, 2012)

TorontoGal said:


> I'll wait for my husband to do this, it's still moving. I'm ok with snakes and scorpions but centipedes.... I just can't.


I hope he is returning soon.


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## Inor (Mar 22, 2013)

They are pretty good in a beef broth. The crunchy part is a weird sensation to get used to at first, but after that they taste just like eagle.


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

I'm mostly a herbivore (except occasional freshly caught fish) but I might change my mind one day.. (Never) haha


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## Ragnarök (Aug 4, 2014)

grab a broom and pop it like a zit ::saber::


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## RNprepper (Apr 5, 2014)

Who needs ammo? Just fling some spiders, roaches, and a snake. And bump oven a hive of bees for good measure. And here I was worried that I didn't have enough experience with guns!


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## dannydefense (Oct 9, 2013)

Inor said:


> They are pretty good in a beef broth. The crunchy part is a weird sensation to get used to at first, but after that they taste just like eagle.


Golden or Bald?


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

Oh hell no...


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

LOL OMG!!


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## Jeep (Aug 5, 2014)

I'd crap on the floor and clean it up forever.


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Mish said:


> LOL OMG!!


Love his liberal use of the F word haha Seriously, a video of these things made me itch all over


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

Mish said:


> Oh hell no...


This video ensures that I'll never be visiting Australia


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## shotlady (Aug 30, 2012)

im fine until roaches or june bugs I cant kill them because I can feel the cracking and pop under my shoe. cant do it! I see the big green beetles upside down and I feel horrible im so scared of them I cannot help them get upright. but im not fixin to kill it- because of the sensation I can feel through my shoes.


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## TG (Jul 28, 2014)

I'm thinking of taking this axe-throwing class, centipedes will be sorry 
Backyard Axe Throwing League (BATL Grounds)


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## Inor (Mar 22, 2013)

shotlady said:


> im fine until roaches or june bugs I cant kill them because I can feel the cracking and pop under my shoe. cant do it! I see the big green beetles upside down and I feel horrible im so scared of them I cannot help them get upright. but im not fixin to kill it- because of the sensation I can feel through my shoes.


We have a LOT of June Bugs in MN. When I was a kid, I used to hit them with a tennis racket when they were flying. They would get spooked and immediately pull in their wings and legs and fly almost forever! If you got the right angle, a few seconds after you hit it, you could hear them hit the neighbor's house or car. That sound was funny as hell; almost but not quite as good as the distinctive "whap" a squirrel makes hitting the ground when he misses jump.


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## Alpha Mike Foxtrot (Sep 2, 2014)

I can't stand creepy-crawly, horrible, slimy, low bellied, venomous, poison filled creatures....especially when serving a second term.


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## Gallo Pazzesco (Dec 22, 2012)

TorontoGal said:


> Red Russian roaches?


... from Russia. They came into NYC over 100 years ago and have spread like, well, like cockroaches.


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## oddapple (Dec 9, 2013)

we have godzilla-pedes 6" long, 1/2" around purple with orangey-yellow legs and they can get you


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## tango (Apr 12, 2013)

We do not have flying roaches here, but, we do have Palmetto bugs that fly, and will take the newspaper away from you if you try to swat them--.


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## oddapple (Dec 9, 2013)

Now that's funny


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## FrostKitten (Aug 22, 2014)

oddapple said:


> we have godzilla-pedes 6" long, 1/2" around purple with orangey-yellow legs and they can get you


Yeah, aren't those venomous? I ask because I heard they were, but it makes it hard to do a search if you don't know the species ^.^;;

But you know what would be even better? Spiders with leg spans the size of dinner plates. *shudders* Mom ran over one when she was in Texas, said she thought it was going to give her a flat tire. That's when I decided I wasn't moving to Texas.


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