# This is a true story.



## The Tourist (Jun 9, 2016)

The day before my birthday I noticed I had a swollen gland behind my right ear. I don't get them often, but I do get them. I dismissed it. Then a few days later I was in pain, and my entire right side jaw had doubled in size. Off to my doctor I go.

I asked him, _"What is it"?_

He responded, _"I don't know by palpating it, could be fluid, could be an abscess."_

I settled back and remarked, "_Well, Mike, you're a doctor and I am retired. Get a scalpel--or I can loan you something really sharp--make a slice, jack it open and let's see what comes out."_

Dr. Mike slumped, _"Chico, I cannot think of any medical situation where an attending physician would choose that as an option..."_

So a few days go by yet again, the lump gets bigger and Dr. Mike is out of town. A young doctor replacement freaks and ships me over to the cat-scan department at the Dean Clinic Fish Hatchery Clinic. I got back from there about 3:30PM today. I was told a call-back would follow.

I did get a call back, from a doctor I never heard off. He said the cat-scan was negative and he wants to see me tomorrow morning at 10:00AM, 05-03-19.

Knowing this might be a delicate exchange since he did not know my sense of humor, I asked him about the procedure.

"_It's quite simple_," the E.N.T doc began, "_I numb you up a bit, take a scalpel, make an incision, pry open the slice with a hemostat, and then drain what comes out..._"

"_Is this ethical?_" I questioned, remembering what Doctor Mike proffered.

"_I don't see why not_," the E.N.T. doctor countered, "_I do several dozen of these per week..._"

Three extra days of pain, a second set of doctor bills, now a surgical invoice and a cat-scan. Wish me luck tomorrow...


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## Joe (Nov 1, 2016)

@The Tourist I think you need a new doc. hire the one that got the job done.


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## Denton (Sep 18, 2012)

Forget luck; we’ll be praying for you.


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## bigwheel (Sep 22, 2014)

Prayers up for a successful procedure and a rapid healing. Just bear in mind half of those jokers graduated in the lower 50% of their class in med school. Hopefully the cutter is in the top half. The other guy obviously isnt. I had my chin swell up one time and the doc wanted to cut a hole in it. I said...hell no. Give me some pills. He did and I got to be as good as new. Glad I didnt listen to that idiot. He got busted for shop lifting at the adjacent town where I worked at. That is low class.


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## The Tourist (Jun 9, 2016)

Thanks, guys, I appreciate the sentiment and the prayers--which I need daily!

Doctor Mike is a good Christian man, and has got me through some pretty tough times. He lives by the healer's credo of "First do no harm."

At my age, a scar on my jaw would be "street creds," LOL. But considering his values, I think Doctor Mike made the hard decision.


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## stevekozak (Oct 4, 2015)

Good to see you back, Brother Man!!!


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## Gunn (Jan 1, 2016)

Good luck. But also welcome to Modern Medicine. Working in a hospital I see this ALL the time. Nobody wants to take the first step in this litigious society.


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## stowlin (Apr 25, 2016)

I hope and pray for your speedy and comfortable recovery.


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## Smitty901 (Nov 16, 2012)

In most cases cysts are not considered some thing medically necessary to remove. Not sure why but people end up suffering as they enlarge when they could have been dealt with early on.


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## Prepared One (Nov 5, 2014)

I had a cyst on my back once. Started small and didn't hurt so I didn't bother with it. Then it started getting bigger so off to the doc I go. First thing he wants to do is send me to get it scanned, ex rays, and run some additional tests, then maybe an oncologist. It is what it is I told him. I am not going to seven different damn doctors and pay for all kinds of additional tests. Cut the thing out and let's move on. He sent me to doctor who does this kind of procedure and it was done. 

Look on you tube to see the procedure and hope that's all it is, a cyst. Hang tuff and good luck.


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## The Tourist (Jun 9, 2016)

Thanks, guys. As you can see, I'm up early. I live in an eastern suburb of Madison and this clinic is set on the Park Street western side of Madison's old ghetto. They've knocked most of it down, but from the Beltline to the curve in Park Street, there are lots of order shops and chicken stands. I drive in a (ahem) "determined" manner. I have a black F-150 with a V-8 and a five speed, replete with a clutch and manual "granny low." The one thing I will not worry about is meeting all you guys at the rendezvous point when the lights go out for the last time.

However, today I might be 'medicated,' so my wife is driving. I thought about giving her an hour, but I'm thinking perhaps 75 minutes might be better...

Edit: _ I'd like to bounce this off of you. Obviously this a family friendly forum. How do you guys feel about "before and after" pictures? My 'better angels' have me undecided._


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## The Tourist (Jun 9, 2016)

Boy, that was a let-down.

I just got back from my appointment with the ENT guy. No knives or scalpels, just some topical anesthetic, then a very thin needle introducing the "happy juice."

When it came to the syringe that was to extract the infection, I felt nothing. However, I did feel him squeeze the tender tissue, much like you'd pop a pimple.

When the dust settled, I asked what the doctor had found. He warned, _"This procedure was to lessen the pressure and provide us a sample for a culture. But I know pus when I see it, you have an abscess. You've improved every day--on no food. The antibiotics are working. You're going to do fine..."_


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## 1skrewsloose (Jun 3, 2013)

Sounds like you're out of the woods. Glad to hear it. Seemingly little things can develop to something bigger. Even though I didn't post earlier, you were in my prayers.


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## A Watchman (Sep 14, 2015)

The Tourist said:


> Thanks, guys. As you can see, I'm up early. I live in an eastern suburb of Madison and this clinic is set on the Park Street western side of Madison's old ghetto. They've knocked most of it down, but from the Beltline to the curve in Park Street, there are lots of order shops and chicken stands. I drive in a (ahem) "determined" manner. I have a black F-150 with a V-8 and a five speed, replete with a clutch and manual "granny low." The one thing I will not worry about is meeting all you guys at the rendezvous point when the lights go out for the last time.
> 
> However, today I might be 'medicated,' so my wife is driving. I thought about giving her an hour, but I'm thinking perhaps 75 minutes might be better...
> 
> Edit: _ I'd like to bounce this off of you. Obviously this a family friendly forum. How do you guys feel about "before and after" pictures? My 'better angels' have me undecided._


I think the pics are an excellent idea, we have no clue as to what your wife looks like. :tango_face_wink:


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## bigwheel (Sep 22, 2014)

The Tourist said:


> Boy, that was a let-down.
> 
> I just got back from my appointment with the ENT guy. No knives or scalpels, just some topical anesthetic, then a very thin needle introducing the "happy juice."
> 
> ...


Praise the Lord! Great news. I have too weak of a tummy to look at gross pictures. Thanks anyway. Slippy will like em maybe.


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