# Serious question for everybody



## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

Ok, long story, I have noticed a guy form high school seems to " have fallen off the deep end" on facebook. He is sounding stark raving freaking lunatical ( is that a word).
I even asked him to call me, he didn't. the next day, he seems normal, then today, BOOM back to talking CRAZY stuff, I mean, CRAZY. No threats or anything, but he does mention "i would never hurt myself or anyone else".
We were "friends" in High School, not like we hung out, but, I can see this going going south real easy?
What the hell do I do, reach out to someone? Ignore? What the hell would I do if he does some dumb shit, I have done nothing to try to intervene?
Obviously, the easiest way, would be sever ties, never worry about him. BUT, GOD forbid he does something, then I gotta wonder if a phone call or something could have changed anything.


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## pheniox17 (Dec 12, 2013)

depends on what kinda crazy bro, mental health is ****ed here, so would be worse there...

my advice call him and talk about old times


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## budgetprepp-n (Apr 7, 2013)

pheniox17 said:


> depends on what kinda crazy bro, mental health is ****ed here, so would be worse there...
> 
> my advice call him and talk about old times


 Yea I think you got it right,,,then go from there


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## The Resister (Jul 24, 2013)

Do you know any of this guy's family so that you could speak to them about your former friend's writings?


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## Casie (Feb 26, 2014)

If his behavior could be drug related, I'd stay far away. The last thing you need is to get sucked into an addict's problems. You'd be the perfect kind of friend for a junkie to really sucker in. You are kind. You want to help. You are a friend. But not so close that you know what he's been up to, so he can get away with lying to you, for a little while at least. And he hasn't already tapped you for money. Or robbed your home.

You are a smart guy. I know you can take care of yourself. Just be careful, Deebo.

Making contact means you are inviting him into your life.


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## Old SF Guy (Dec 15, 2013)

I think in todays times, with all of the craziness of mass shootings to get attention or whatever you want to label it....I would feel pretty guilty if I saw what could be labeled as indicators and stayed silent. I recommend looking into his friends list for parents, siblings, etc, and chatting them up directly and seeing if the guy is on/off meds...maybe even discuss with the parents/siblings speaking to a professional about a Psych eval...voluntary or committed if warranted. And then once you have a good understanding of the fellows current condition, if it's more a "Life's got me down, or sucks scenario, then maybe start engaging the guy to see if he needs an ear to bend or a shoulder to cry on. Rushing into a situation that could have severe components to it (psychological issues, drugs) is never a good thing in my book. Recon the objective...make plans, rehearse, modify plans, rehearse, execute....recover...drink a beer.


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## csi-tech (Apr 13, 2013)

It never fails to amaze me how many people out here are actually certifiable. It can happen suddenly or gradually. Boys I graduated with are now women, some are delusional and can't even hold a conversation. My own sister descended into mental illness and the substance abuse that so often accompanies it and has since passed away. She was a brilliant, wealthy, professional and beautiful woman. 

If your friend says anything that would cause you concern for his safety or anyone elses I would notify his local Police Department and request a welfare check.


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## omegabrock (Jun 16, 2014)

it's one of those situations where you have to be as alert as you can and each situation takes different actions. if someone actually wants to kill them self, they won't advertise it. when you advertise it, people will try and stop you. same *can* be said if someone wants to hurt someone else (unless they are doing it in a way they sound like they are bragging about it...then it's about notoriety). that's not saying they won't do either in the future but if what he says now is causing concern, it would be a bigger red flag if he completely stopped out of the blue. try to find someone that has closer contact with him like was said earlier and get information from them or at least let them know what he is saying causes issues. 

be aware and approach with caution. without getting into too much detail, we have a mental health problem in the US and i never felt better until i got off medication 'they' said i needed


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## Guest (Jun 20, 2014)

you termed it a "friend" from high school. I would stay away from it..sounds cold but its the truth. what you find may be more disturbing than you previously thought and if you make contact with him and then never contact him again he might just do something he otherwise would not...some people are crazy forever, some people have breakdowns and then get through them and are stronger for it. 

If he is a good friend then i would try to help him. its up to you..follow your heart


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## machinejjh (Nov 13, 2012)

Sometimes we have to be merciful, and sometimes we have to be cold. Only you can determine which this situation warrants. Realize any intervention will not be brief, and you will be saddled with his problems until they are resolved. Is it worth the stress to you? It is hard to be cold, I know. But he is not your responsibility. I would contact his relatives, and place it in their hands. Your conscience is clear, without your involvement.


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## jbrooks19 (May 22, 2014)

You can only help someone who is willing to accept the help


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## Old SF Guy (Dec 15, 2013)

Look guys...all of you...How many reports have come in about the guy who started posting strange things, rants, etc...and then all of a sudden we are getting new wave of gun violence with the added Gun ban/registration/restriction crap. I don;t care if you even like the guy...The right thing to do...if your a 2nd amendment supporter in this case is notify someone...speak out...report it...so that when some asshole film producers sons goes nuts and shoots people.... we can say...the police didn't do there job, or a DR failed to report it as mandated...or at least say it was a mental thing not a weapons thing. I'm not asking DEEBO to throw himself into the fray.... He feels a connection and wants to help.. Talking to the family to get them to act, or at least ascertain what the issues are is prudent...barring that reaching out to local health and welfare/law enforcement to express a concern is another, although I fear how someone deranged would respond to the "Man" showing up at the door. THink about it Deebo, decide your course of action, and do it...because I don;t want to hear about my friend Deebo being depressed because someone he knew killed 10 kids at a play ground next week...I care for your well being too my friend.


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## shotlady (Aug 30, 2012)

I would contact local sherrif or police with a screen shot so they can get the idea of how serious this is. this way he doesn't hurt anyone. and you know what? you don't want to be that friend that maybe coulda done something but didn't.


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## pheniox17 (Dec 12, 2013)

remember, we don't know the story, just one of his mates is posting questionable material...

could be self halm, drug issues, divorce, shit there are tonnes of triggers

but if I was going through a tough time and someone got my family involved I would be pissed


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## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

Well, i honestly want to Thank All of yoiu. I have made up my mind, i do not know any of his family, I will reach out tonight to some of his "close friends" from school.
Like OSFG and alot have mentioned, I would rather be an "asshole that called and mady a friend mad, than a guy that has to wonder "why I didnt do something".
I will go with that, and see where it goes, but, no, there is no way Deebo will get involved with a any user, be it drug or money leaching. I have enough problems of my own, but I GOTTA try and reach out, even if I loose a friend. 
Sound advice, all around.
Will keep ya posted.


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## Maine-Marine (Mar 7, 2014)

Repeat after me...Not my circus, not my parade, not my clowns....


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## Innkeeper (Jun 18, 2014)

Do you know if he is a Vet? Military 1source and the VA have helplines set up to reach out and help vets who may be feeling suicidal or worst case homicidal, and it is never wrong to try to help a brother, even if he is not a vet it is never wrong to help your fellow brother.


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## Casie (Feb 26, 2014)

Old SF Guy said:


> Recon the objective...make plans, rehearse, modify plans, rehearse, execute....recover...drink a beer.


Best advice! Recon!


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Say a prayer. Good luck Deebo.


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## Smokin04 (Jan 29, 2014)

To me it sounds like substance abuse....or maybe he's on anti-depressants, or other mind-numbing/altering medications. I agree with what Casie said...treat this with kid gloves...medicated people can go screwy real quick. Professionals need to get involved.


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## SARGE7402 (Nov 18, 2012)

shotlady said:


> I would contact local sherrif or police with a screen shot so they can get the idea of how serious this is. this way he doesn't hurt anyone. and you know what? you don't want to be that friend that maybe coulda done something but didn't.


Shot lady has the right Idea. One area that the LEO community does not have access to -not usually - is the mental health records. Normally that's restricted only to MH professionals. LEO"s don't normally get involved with what are known as voluntary admissions - I E those that check them selves in. My former partner gave me the impression that the MH community can check that - Not LEO"s - and put that patient's doctor in touch with the patient that may be having trouble.

If the doc believes the patient is capable of harming someone - even themselves - they've (at least here in VA) got a responsibility to notify the LE community and we bring the person in for an independent evaluation by a MH professional. If they think he/she is a danger they can commit them for observation for 72 hours after which they must present their findings to a judge who can order a long term involuntary committal.


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## PaulS (Mar 11, 2013)

OK, my Windoze computer just decided to shut down my key board so I am on my linux machine - this time my post won't go away.

1. the police won't get involved unless a crime has been committed. He has said he would not hurt himself or anyone else so they won't get involved.

2. He might just be using the media to vent - that could be a good thing - it helps to vent sometimes - to put things into perspective.

3. He might be trying to get attention - if it works it will progress. If it doesn't he may quit.

You have no concept of the dynamics of the situation. By getting involved you may place yourself, your friends and your family in jeaprody. You could tell him to seek help from his church, a counsellor or other professional without revealing who you are. You are not close - you don't know his family - you can talk to his friends if you know them but tell them to suggest proffessional help. You don't want to get them involved in something they are ill equipped to handle.

The best thing that you can actively do is to watch for a change in his attitude toward injuring himself or others. If that happens then you can call the police and recommend an evaluation. It is unlikely that an evaluation will find that he is dangerous to himself or others but it is all you can do.


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## omegabrock (Jun 16, 2014)

Innkeeper said:


> Do you know if he is a Vet? Military 1source and the VA have helplines set up to reach out and help vets who may be feeling suicidal or worst case homicidal, and it is never wrong to try to help a brother, even if he is not a vet it is never wrong to help your fellow brother.


dysfunctional veterans on facebook (and their website) give some good advice as well...as long as he has thick skin.


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## scramble4a5 (Nov 1, 2012)

Reach out to his family. I've been there.


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## Deebo (Oct 27, 2012)

Ok, update from the long weekend. I did reach out to some friends, and it seems he has done this before. 
I have "exited the building", I hate to, but I am not a therapist, he is a grown man, and I asked him he needed anything, no answer, so, all I can say is I did try.
God help him, and I want to say THANK YOU to all who expressed concern and caring, and both sides of "the coin". 
Believe me, Deebo has enough of his own problems, without adding anything else. 
I respect all yall, and cant wait to se some of you.


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## Montana Rancher (Mar 4, 2013)

Deebo said:


> Ok, long story, I have noticed a guy form high school seems to " have fallen off the deep end" on facebook. He is sounding stark raving freaking lunatical ( is that a word).
> I even asked him to call me, he didn't. the next day, he seems normal, then today, BOOM back to talking CRAZY stuff, I mean, CRAZY. No threats or anything, but he does mention "i would never hurt myself or anyone else".
> We were "friends" in High School, not like we hung out, but, I can see this going going south real easy?
> What the hell do I do, reach out to someone? Ignore? What the hell would I do if he does some dumb shit, I have done nothing to try to intervene?
> Obviously, the easiest way, would be sever ties, never worry about him. BUT, GOD forbid he does something, then I gotta wonder if a phone call or something could have changed anything.


In Montana we SSS

That is Shoot Shovel and Shut up


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## Innkeeper (Jun 18, 2014)

omegabrock said:


> dysfunctional veterans on facebook (and their website) give some good advice as well...as long as he has thick skin.


See I do not do that Facebook thing so I do not keep up on that side of answers. There are also Vet Centers now for those people willing to give group therapy a try it is run By Vets for Vets and is usually found in medium to larger towns usually those with out a VA Hospital.


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