# This means war!!!!!!!



## csi-tech (Apr 13, 2013)

Some 'lil nocturnal fuzzy bastard has been stealing my tomatoes! No sooner do they get to the size of a golf ball and they vanish, without a trace. Oh man am I mad! At first I thought the wind had blown them off and they had just rolled down the hill. Last night 5 disappeared and it was only sprinkling. 

Oh yeah! It's on like Donkey Kong! The HCO Scoutguard camera has been deployed in all of it's infrared goodness and the .22 LR is loaded and ready to visit hell upon his tomato thieving ass!

In the interest of fairness I have also filled the bird feeder with plenty of seed and suet and tossed shelled corn on the ground. If something is hungry I want to help out ya' know. If it persists on eating my Better Boys :armata_PDT_36:

I will post the videos


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## AquaHull (Jun 10, 2012)

Prolly Bambi


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## PaulS (Mar 11, 2013)

It's annihilation when the other party is not fighting back. It might be war if you tried to take it bare-handed.


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## Hawaii Volcano Squad (Sep 25, 2013)

Slap on loads of face camo paint, a Gillie suit, and setup a night ambush with a claymore


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## Medic33 (Mar 29, 2015)

I am sorry it was me would you like them back?


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## Hawaii Volcano Squad (Sep 25, 2013)

Dead fall traps, Punji stcks...


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## Farmboyc (May 9, 2015)

Nothing says leave my tomaters alone like Napalm.
"I live the smell of Napalm and fried green tomaters. "


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## PaulS (Mar 11, 2013)

I didn't realize there were so many people here just like me!


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## oddapple (Dec 9, 2013)

In the country you have to put fence around gardens. Everything eats freely out there. It's a chum patch.
Fence takes care of deer and bigger folks but squirrels and birds still get in. Scarecrows still work especially if something moves in the wind.
But garden without fence is like grocery without registers or doors.


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## Ripon (Dec 22, 2012)

Screw the 22 go Big and make em pay!


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## paraquack (Mar 1, 2013)

30.06


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

Put a tomato on a rat trap. Tie the rat trap to a spike.


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

20 Mike Mike.


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## paraquack (Mar 1, 2013)

40mm Bofors, in case he makes a run for it.


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## Farmboyc (May 9, 2015)

Do you have access to grenades?


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## Camel923 (Aug 13, 2014)

How about a drone with thermal sights and Ma Duce?


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## alterego (Jan 27, 2013)

A Remington 1100 with a vent rib will allow you to zip tie a mag light 3 d cell flashlight along side the barrel 5 rounds of 3 inch magnum buck shot will detour even the ardent vegetable thief.


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## Hawaii Volcano Squad (Sep 25, 2013)

You better hope the furry critters don't have a community forum on how to deal with pesky Tomato farmers! :wraith01:


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## SGT E (Feb 25, 2015)

Get 40 pounds of Tannerite and mix well in a waterproof lowes bucket and cover the bucket with old nuts and bolts from a junkyard and epoxy....whatever the hell it is gets close shoot the tannerite.....Make sure you have none pointed toward you!...leave a 6 inch space in the bucket to shoot...you won't have to clean up the next morning.....your neihbors however may not be so lucky!


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## SGT E (Feb 25, 2015)

Screw it...Just call me and I'll drop a round in your garden....you may not want to be home that night.....Read the fine print on the projectile.....Just be at least 50 miles away...


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## SGT E (Feb 25, 2015)

View attachment 11903
Screw it...Just call me and I'll drop a round in your garden....you may not want to be home that night.....Read the fine print on the projectile.....Just be at least 50 miles away... That's 40 Kilotons max....5 times Hiroshima.........you need room to run...


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

AC-130


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## paraquack (Mar 1, 2013)

Call in a B-52 for a stike mission.





Or a c-130 with this bad boy.


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## sparkyprep (Jul 5, 2013)

James m said:


> AC-130


Call in the Spooky!


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

Nuclear Armageddon. Minuteman III.


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## sideKahr (Oct 15, 2014)

Why fool around with a piddling little Minuteman. TSAR BOMBA, 50 megatons of tomato-defending power. May your holiday be warm and bright:


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## csi-tech (Apr 13, 2013)

Oh, Don't think I won't call in an airstrike! I put the tiny cadre on high alert and they are rehearsing for an assault as I speak.



I have also been reading up on something called a JDAM.


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

This thread has cracked me up!!
You people are nutz!!


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## GTGallop (Nov 11, 2012)

Ripon said:


> Screw the 22 go Big and make em pay!


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## paraquack (Mar 1, 2013)

Mish said:


> This thread has cracked me up!!
> You people are nutz!!


Mish, have you looked at your avatar recently?


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

paraquack said:


> Mish, have you looked at your avatar recently?


Have no mistake about it, I'm batshit crazy!! Mahaha!!


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## csi-tech (Apr 13, 2013)

Mish said:


> Have no mistake about it, I'm batshit crazy!! Mahaha!!


She finally admitted it, now lets bring it on in for a big group hug and heal from the love.


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## Farmboyc (May 9, 2015)

http://i939.photobucket.com/albums/...ill-murray-caddyshack-250x174_zpsvajk5xxr.jpg


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## Auntie (Oct 4, 2014)

I am low tech


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## Tennessee (Feb 1, 2014)

I’ve been trapping the ground squirrels and haling them off. The other day I noticed a gray squirrel eating my tomatoes. What pissed me off the most was they would take just one bite off each of the ripe tomatoes. So I broke out my air rifle and sent 4 of the furry bastards to squirrel heaven. I took the screen off the second floor bedroom windows that overlooked the garden, so I call it death from above. It was a good time for all except the squirrels. The .177 at 1400 fps will drop them in their tracks.


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## sideKahr (Oct 15, 2014)

Tennessee said:


> ...So I broke out my air rifle and sent 4 of the furry bastards to squirrel heaven. I took the screen off the second floor bedroom windows that overlooked the garden, so I call it death from above. It was a good time for all except the squirrels. The .177 at 1400 fps will drop them in their tracks.


When my garden was active, I used a double barreled attack of a .22 Crossman Air Rifle, coupled with biological warfare in the form of my big tomcat 'Barko'. He was hell on grinnies, moles, and rabbits. I took care of the tree rats.


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)




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## Quip (Nov 8, 2012)

This may help.


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## paraquack (Mar 1, 2013)

sideKahr said:


> When my garden was active, I used a double barreled attack of a .22 Crossman Air Rifle, coupled with biological warfare in the form of my big tomcat 'Barko'. He was hell on grinnies, moles, and rabbits. I took care of the tree rats.


OMG, I haven't heard the term grinnies in years. How old are you?


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## sideKahr (Oct 15, 2014)

paraquack said:


> OMG, I haven't heard the term grinnies in years. How old are you?


62, my friend. I've always called chipmunks grinnies, don't remember where I learned it.


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## bigwheel (Sep 22, 2014)

The squirrels are on an apple eating orgy around here.


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## Medic33 (Mar 29, 2015)

they have get goats milk from somewhere.
(my wife asked were goats milk comes from and my answer was squirrels)
I know what she was really asking. I was cooking and having a bad day plus she just walked in the door.


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## east mountain preppers (Jun 23, 2015)

I watched one pull a 4' milk weed into ground. Remember the cartoons were the vermin would pull the carrot into the ground ? Kinda like that. I went to the fireworks stand and got some smoke bombs and bottle rockets. Dont know if i ever even bothered there 4th, but i had fun trying:armata_PDT_36:


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## Auntie (Oct 4, 2014)

Any update on the hunt and who the perp is?


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## csi-tech (Apr 13, 2013)

Nothing on the camera tonight. When I came home I had some kittens playing around my tomatoes. Momma is a black and white cat that belongs to the deceased crazy cat lady that lived behind me. They are ferule now. I doubt kittens eat tomatoes though. Even if they were I don't have the heart to kill them. My neighbor gave me some humint. He said that he saw a squirrel with a green tomato in his mouth two days ago. 

Interesting sideline here, the crazy cat lady died chasing my Basset Lab mix. He had been over there screwing with her cats and she was PISSED! She chased him across the creek with a newspaper in her hand yelling and keeled over next door. My neighbor called EMS. Milo still feels kind of guilty over that.


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