# stealthy meal preparations.



## lauras2u

Although I plan to feed several neighbors, I do not want to advertise and attract hungry people. I am wondering if anyone has solutions to cooking foods but keeping smoke and smell down. I am willing to install filters and a fan out one of the basement windows but i must keep the smell down if i bug in.....


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## Medic33

can of beans on the old kerosene heater or ravioli or something.
wrap tin foil around a burrito put it on your exhaust manifold and drive a mile -also called the mile burrito -my work well for that plan to bug out to a hotel.
or if you really want you could just get the MRE's(yes I went there) that have the heaters in them -they work by just adding water you know.


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## Targetshooter

I understand in what you are doing , but if you start given out food you are going to have every tom , dick , harry will be knocking on your door wanting food , some with guns , some with out guns , I think you will be in deep :vs_poop: , my prayers go out to you in that time , you will need them . JMHO


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## rice paddy daddy

Eating canned foods straight out of the can at room temperature will keep you alive.
Just "go infantry".


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## A Watchman

If you want to contain smell and smoke, you need to think warm up instead of cook. Bland instead of spices.


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## sideKahr

RPD has it right. Cold camp. It is the end of the world, after all.


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## rice paddy daddy

sideKahr said:


> RPD has it right. Cold camp. It is the end of the world, after all.


Of course, if one has some C-4 plastic explosive a pinch lit with a match will provide a lot of heat for a can of chow.
But then, who has C-4 laying around?


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## Slippy

In a total grid down, SHTF, TEOTWAWKI Zombie Apocolypse, I plan on changing my cooking habits not 1 bit!

The stench of rotting heads on Gen-U-Wine SlippyMade Pikes should easily mask the aroma of Chateaubriand for Two, Garlic Infused Twice Cooked Truffles, Brown Sugar and Buttered Sweet Baby Carrots and a wonderful Wine Mushroom Reduction Sauce, 1947 Cheval-Blanc of course.

lain:


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## A Watchman

Slippy said:


> In a total grid down, SHTF, TEOTWAWKI Zombie Apocolypse, I plan on changing my cooking habits not 1 bit!
> 
> The stench of rotting heads on Gen-U-Wine SlippyMade Pikes should easily mask the aroma of Chateaubriand for Two, Garlic Infused Twice Cooked Truffles, Brown Sugar and Buttered Sweet Baby Carrots and a wonderful Wine Mushroom Reduction Sauce, 1947 Cheval-Blanc of course.
> 
> lain:


OK Slip, I get ya and it's a solid plan, ..... but here of late on ole PF, a new scenario has been introduced that I believe most of us have overlooked including you. What about the bug out to the hotel room plan so you can still work on your computer huh? That hotel hallway is gonna get pretty ripe real quick.


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## rice paddy daddy

I guess I'm lucky.
I actually enjoy Van Camp beanie- wienies straight out of the can at room temperature.
It must be an acquired taste, much like drinking straight Scotch.


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## Prepared One

rice paddy daddy said:


> Eating canned foods straight out of the can at room temperature will keep you alive.
> Just "go infantry".


Hell, I do that now. I will open a can of beans or corned beef hash and eat right out of the can. Drives my wife crazy. :devil:


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## A Watchman

rice paddy daddy said:


> I guess I'm lucky.
> I actually enjoy Van Camp beanie- wienies straight out of the can at room temperature.
> It must be an acquired taste, much like drinking straight Scotch.





Prepared One said:


> Hell, I do that now. I will open a can of beans or corned beef hash and eat right out of the can. Drives my wife crazy. :devil:


What the hell is wrong with you two?

Geez, while I can rock in a kitchen, on a grill, and even in a fine restaurant. I am just as happy (and often indulge with the simplicity) of a can of beanie weinees, Vienna sausage, sardines, and yes ... corned beef hash. Cold and right out of the can, all of it good stuff. Been doing it all of my life, and not because I had to. Yea, my wife and others as well, think I am smoked.


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## rice paddy daddy

We have been married 27 years.
The wife long ago learned "that boy just ain't right".


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## rice paddy daddy

All right. Show of hands.
How many LOVE Spam cold?


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## Slippy

rice paddy daddy said:


> All right. Show of hands.
> How many LOVE Spam cold?


Sorry RPD,

Panfried SPAM for me. Never cold...


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## sideKahr

I can eat Spam hot or cold. But I think my wife is getting sick of it.


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## 7515

A Watchman said:


> If you want to contain smell and smoke, you need to think warm up instead of cook. Bland instead of spices.


Here is the answer lauras2u.


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## sideKahr

Hey this thread reminds me of an experiment I did once. I found that a tea light will heat a can of soup to 180 deg F, with very little odor, before it burns out. Just put a small puncture in the lid, don't open it all the way until it's hot. Let the flame just touch the bottom. I even made a little stove / stand to do it with.


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## Prepared One

I will eat it cold or fried. I have even grilled it. Good stuff.


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## Prepared One

A Watchman said:


> What the hell is wrong with you two?
> 
> Geez, while I can rock in a kitchen, on a grill, and even in a fine restaurant. I am just as happy (and often indulge with the simplicity) of a can of beanie weinees, Vienna sausage, sardines, and yes ... corned beef hash. Cold and right out of the can, all of it good stuff. Been doing it all of my life, and not because I had to. Yea, my wife and others as well, think I am smoked.


Beanie Weenie's right out of the can with Tabasco! The wife says that is disgusting. :vs_lol:


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## AnotherSOFSurvivor

Eat it cold, that is the way to really do it...you can make some elaborate exhaust system that vents into the ground a few hundred feet away or hook into your weeping system but thats crazy



sent from a paper cup and string via quantum wierdness


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## A Watchman

Prepared One said:


> Beanie Weenie's right out of the can with Tabasco! The wife says that is disgusting. :vs_lol:


Sounds like you have things in perfect order. You will get to enjoy the whole can by yourself ... in peace.


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## Illini Warrior

don't worry about the types of food being prepared as much as your SHTF "kitchen" ... first off - if the SHTF is serious enough to be in "food blackout" - don't plan on using your regular kitchen - even if the utilities are still up - "stage" the regular kitchen to look "used" for minimal cooking with some basic food stocked as a decoy ....

good chance you'll be needing a portable camp stove (white gas/propane)(an electric hotplate for grid option) - gives you flexibility on locating the stove - a basement or 2nd story would be better than ground floor - you have observation/sound/smell to combat - as already mentioned it's smell that'll get you killed - a blind man's hearing is more acute and a starving man will smell beans cooking for a block away .... you need to get that cooking smell accumulating under a vented hood and vented up up up and out - even if the smell comes back down to ground level it'll be a hard trace .... 

I plan on setting up a SHTF kitchen in the basement and using a 12V computer muffin fan for venting into either the soil pipe or chimney - exiting 25'+ above ground level ....

"covert" cooking - not discussed near as much as it should be ....


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## Real Old Man

rice paddy daddy said:


> Eating canned foods straight out of the can at room temperature will keep you alive.
> Just "go infantry".


I'd stock up on ham and lima beans.


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## Real Old Man

A Watchman said:


> OK Slip, I get ya and it's a solid plan, ..... but here of late on ole PF, a new scenario has been introduced that I believe most of us have overlooked including you. What about the bug out to the hotel room plan so you can still work on your computer huh? That hotel hallway is gonna get pretty ripe real quick.


Watch the ole slip master has a point of view that a number of us old timers have. We're not living in a major Urban area. think it was M&M that pointed out that that is a recipe for disaster in the long run.

And if you are going to try and feed some of your neighbors then you are going to have to come to grips with all of them in some form of a workable arrangement.

Slip RPD and M&M and I are in rural areas where neighbors are few and far between but also more than likely able to fend for themselves.

If I were laurie I'd be making long term plans to get the flip out of dodge to the out back as soon as possible


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## Real Old Man

rice paddy daddy said:


> I guess I'm lucky.
> I actually enjoy Van Camp beanie- wienies straight out of the can at room temperature.
> It must be an acquired taste, much like drinking straight Scotch.


actually corned beef hash and spagetti and meat balls are both good right out of the can.

Or heat them on the front dash board on a bright sunshiny day


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## A Watchman

Real Old Man said:


> actually corned beef hash and spagetti and meat balls are both good right out of the can.
> 
> Or heat them on the front dash board on a bright sunshiny day


My apologies ... I failed to mention canned spaghetti. :tango_face_grin:


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## rice paddy daddy

Real Old Man said:


> I'd stock up on ham and lima beans.


Only if I've got some pound cake and canned peaches to kill the taste.:vs_lol:


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## Medic33

eating can stuff cold is a good idea - I eat ravioli out in the sticks cold all the time I buy it by the flat when it's on sale chef boyardi or something.
but for those that have a fire place you can cook stuff in there you know.
I too live out in the sticks so I am not to worried about someone smelling my back yard BBQ


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## Real Old Man

rice paddy daddy said:


> Only if I've got some pound cake and canned peaches to kill the taste.:vs_lol:


remember they can be used as a weapon in a last ditch episode


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## tango

Spam is good cold or hot
Chicken noodle soup cold from the can is good too.
Having some surplus Heat tabs is a good way to warm a can


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## Medic33

you know this has got me thinking --if you are planning to bug out to a motel and you don't know how to use a micro wave then you must have some issues.
or are you afraid of the microwave cause it uses radiation to heat yourfood and might explode now because trump is president.


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## Maine-Marine

Reason number 47 why not to live in an environment that is neighbor heavy


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## 8301

Medic33 said:


> can of beans on the old kerosene heater or ravioli or something.
> wrap tin foil around a burrito put it on your exhaust manifold and drive a mile -also called the mile burrito


Back when I drove trucks we would put a can of something on the engine and drive at least an hour before eating a hot meal.
Most long distance drivers (OTR) would spend money like a drunk sailor in the truckstop restaurants but I preferred to save the cash.


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## Real Old Man

Maine-Marine said:


> Reason number 47 why not to live in an environment that is neighbor heavy


There are neighbors and neighbors. Small rural communities will tend to survive more or less in tact, larger tows or cities won't survive a major break down in societal structure.

Also not being armed makes a big difference between being a sheep and a sheep dog


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## inceptor

Spam? Y'all are some sick puppies. smh


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## hag

inceptor said:


> Spam? Y'all are some sick puppies. smh


At save a lot, they have a generic spam called "treet". Half the flavor, half the price


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## A Watchman

hag said:


> At save a lot, they have a generic spam called "treet". Half the flavor, half the price


Both would be pluses relative to eating spam.


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## Joe

lauras2u said:


> Although I plan to feed several neighbors, I do not want to advertise and attract hungry people. I am wondering if anyone has solutions to cooking foods but keeping smoke and smell down. I am willing to install filters and a fan out one of the basement windows but i must keep the smell down if i bug in.....


Laura, it might be worth your time to experiment with a small butane stove. They are safe to use indoors and they are very handy to use. They are also economical to operate.


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## Real Old Man

inceptor said:


> Spam? Y'all are some sick puppies. smh


guess potted meat is not on your list of delicacies


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## Jakthesoldier

Cooking food smells.
Possibly you might consider an air filtration system on your home that will reduce smells that escape?
If S really HTF, your home will be a target, just like every other standing structure. Your presence will be a beacon because if you haven't left to join the masses searching for food, you must already have some. People will ransack every place they see for the chance of finding something useful, so being able to defend yours might be more important than keeping people from knowing you have food.


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## inceptor

Real Old Man said:


> guess potted meat is not on your list of delicacies


You guessed correctly. :vs_laugh:


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