# Men only Birth control (kidding)



## Smitty901 (Nov 16, 2012)

Birth control is not a one way deal.
After we had 3 children I had the tubes clipped .It was easier and safe for me than her, less chance of any long term issues and a life time on birth control was not an option. We did the home work
Men do play a roll in the options.
No I did not read the Ladies only On the title.


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## tinkerhell (Oct 8, 2014)

You could do alot worse than flipping them over.


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## Arklatex (May 24, 2014)

No thanks.


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

Awwwww, wimp!!! Just buy a bag of frozen peas and you'll be fine. 
Do I need to remind you guys that women go through childbirth?!!


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## Arklatex (May 24, 2014)

Do you always have to bring that up!


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## Smitty901 (Nov 16, 2012)

Arklatex said:


> No thanks.
> 
> View attachment 10828


 After knowing women that had serious health issue due to long term use of birth control pills, we were looking at options. At 24 we had 2 children and not a regret. We wanted more but the real world catches up fast . We decide one more and waited a bit at 27 we had 3 children and she was to be the last. Once we knew 3 would be it we began the home work looking at all options. 
Once it was done no more pills no more concerns and no health related issue for her. Maybe not for everyone but worked for us and so easy .
When it comes to preparing most topics are on the table. Most need at least to be looked at.

The procedure is simple easy and nothing to it. Took less than 20 minutes and most of that was just minor prep.
Yes I have a good idea what goes on in child birth I have been in the room for the whole time during 5 of them. 
3 of our own
1 good friend that was alone. She gave my some harsh words I had to remind her I was not the father, doctor though it was funny.
1 grand child, that was interesting it was a large family birthing room.
Child birth will become a much bigger issue should S really hit fan.


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

Arklatex said:


> Do you always have to bring that up!


@$$$%[email protected]@ yeah, I do!!!


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Smitty continues to amaze me. I was just talking to Arklatex the other day and Ark said "Hey Slip, I think Smitty should start a thread about vasectomies". 

I said, "Ark, you are out of your crazy Texas mind, man! They's no way that Smitty would do that". 

Ark said, "I betcha a dollar chump."

I said, "make it 2, mama need a new pair of shoes".


Well looks like Slip is paying up again....


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## PatriotFlamethrower (Jan 10, 2015)

If I knew then what I know now, I would have had a vasectomy BEFORE I got married to my first wife, and BEFORE I ended up fathering five boys.

If I knew then what I know now, I would have spent my life having DOGS instead of children.

My 4th wife is great. 13 years and not one second of regret. 

My first three marriages were due to my agonizing lapses in judgment, and being a very poor judge of character. :Confuse:


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## Smitty901 (Nov 16, 2012)

Slippy said:


> Smitty continues to amaze me. I was just talking to Arklatex the other day and Ark said "Hey Slip, I think Smitty should start a thread about vasectomies".
> 
> I said, "Ark, you are out of your crazy Texas mind, man! They's no way that Smitty would do that".
> 
> ...


 While running down the list I noticed the women only thread. The topic birth control. Well being a person that does follow the rules. Except when others forced me to make my own. I did not enter the thread. I did however feel a need to make the point about it being a two person conversation.


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## jimb1972 (Nov 12, 2012)

Mish said:


> Awwwww, wimp!!! Just buy a bag of frozen peas and you'll be fine.
> Do I need to remind you guys that women go through childbirth?!!


Must not be that painful, either that or women would have to be messed up in the head to want to do it again. I am guessing that with epidurals and pain drugs most women don't feel much pain.


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## csi-tech (Apr 13, 2013)

Thanks for that Jimb, you doomed us all to hell.

I had my nertz clipped. Had a brief bout of hematospermia afterwards, that was gross. Vampire chicks would love it I guess.


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## phrogman (Apr 17, 2014)

Mrs. Phrogy said "if you don't get cut you don't get none". So I got cut.✂😖


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## Prepared One (Nov 5, 2014)

Mish said:


> @$$$%[email protected]@ yeah, I do!!!


Oh mish...Just squeeze that puppy out and get breakfast on the table.


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## GTGallop (Nov 11, 2012)

I did the V and never regretted it. Well ok - maybe for a few days and then when I had to go had over a little jar of spooge as a test a week later - that was uncomfortable. But outside of that, no regrets. We only wanted one kid so we would know we could always afford her and take care of her and my wife has a comprised immune system so it made real good sense. The other cool part is that our insurance covered it at 100%.


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

Prepared One said:


> Oh mish...Just squeeze that puppy out and get breakfast on the table.


LOL This made my day!!!


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## csi-tech (Apr 13, 2013)

GTGallop said:


> I did the V and never regretted it. Well ok - maybe for a few days and then when I had to go had over a little jar of spooge as a test a week later - that was uncomfortable. But outside of that, no regrets. We only wanted one kid so we would know we could always afford her and take care of her and my wife has a comprised immune system so it made real good sense. The other cool part is that our insurance covered it at 100%.


My wife was the go between for the samples. Evidently they didn't test for alpha amylase, just viable spermatozoa.


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Many years ago, Mrs Slippy and I decided to get it done. I was in great shape, cleanly shaved and feeling very good about being naked in order for a Doctor to use a very sharp implement and cut me below my nuts while a female nurse looked on and assisted. 

Then on the way to the doctor's office Mrs Slippy had a change of mind and said she may want another child and pleaded with me not to do it. We called the doctor and cancelled the appointment. 

I haven't looked that good naked since then...


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## Smitty901 (Nov 16, 2012)

We did include another child in out home pre teen we knew things were not working out at home for her. She was really a second daughter for the high school years . And I still a member of both families.
We are now enjoying the Grandparent stage now. with 2 at 6 1/2 one 10 years old and one 16 1/2 years old. Maybe the best part of being a parent is latter being a grand parent.
Watch out liberals I have now influenced 2 generations.


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## Maine-Marine (Mar 7, 2014)

Mish said:


> Awwwww, wimp!!! Just buy a bag of frozen peas and you'll be fine.
> Do I need to remind you guys that women go through childbirth?!!


interestingly enough...even after a women goes through child birth she will what another child..Ask any man that has gotten kicked in the balls if he wants to get kicked in the balls again....


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## paraquack (Mar 1, 2013)

At the hospital where my worked, a Navy doctor moonlighting, did a vasectomy on a guy and somehow managed to nick his femoral artery. He kept on trying to put a couple of sutures in it (the guy is awake of course and see the blood spurting and then fortunately passed out) instead of calling for a surgeon. Unfortunately, the guy ended up bleeding out and died.
I know this is an extremely rare incidence, but no thanks.


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## SecretPrepper (Mar 25, 2014)

I'm not in the medical field. I have not done any extinsive resurch on the nut sack. I was not aware that the femoral artery was in the sack. I have cut more calves than I care to count without ever killing one. I guess I have just been lucky several thousand times.


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## Smitty901 (Nov 16, 2012)

paraquack said:


> At the hospital where my worked, a Navy doctor moonlighting, did a vasectomy on a guy and somehow managed to nick his femoral artery. He kept on trying to put a couple of sutures in it (the guy is awake of course and see the blood spurting and then fortunately passed out) instead of calling for a surgeon. Unfortunately, the guy ended up bleeding out and died.
> I know this is an extremely rare incidence, but no thanks.


 Sounds strange . All that is done is a very small cut in the sack the tubes are located cut and curarized or clipped and one stitch closes the cut. Easier than castrating a pig .
I could have done my own V with ease.


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Smitty901 said:


> I could have done my own V with ease.


Flexibility would be an issue for me now...:concern:


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## Kauboy (May 12, 2014)

My wife decided for herself that she would have her tubes tied during the delivery of our last child. It was a scheduled cesarean, so they were already in there. Saved time and money to do it all at once. We were more than content with two healthy kids. 1 boy, 1 girl. We had successfully replaced ourselves on this earth.


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## Kauboy (May 12, 2014)

paraquack said:


> At the hospital where my worked, a Navy doctor moonlighting, did a vasectomy on a guy and somehow managed to nick his femoral artery. He kept on trying to put a couple of sutures in it (the guy is awake of course and see the blood spurting and then fortunately passed out) instead of calling for a surgeon. Unfortunately, the guy ended up bleeding out and died.
> I know this is an extremely rare incidence, but no thanks.


The femoral artery is in the leg.
What in the world was he doing there?
Perhaps it was an artery by a different name that fed the femoral?


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Kauboy said:


> The femoral artery is in the leg.
> What in the world was he doing there?
> Perhaps it was an artery by a different name that fed the femoral?


The Internal Pudendal Artery or one of its branches (Uterine or Rectal artery, I forget?) are nearer the scrotum than the Femoral Artery but I don't think you would bleed out that quickly if those were nicked. The Femoral, yes.


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## HuntingHawk (Dec 16, 2012)

I've heard women say an unexpected swift kick in the nuts usually works real good for birth control. :spank:


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## PaulS (Mar 11, 2013)

Right after childbirth a womans body produces a tremendous amount of endorphins (the bodies natural opiates). It causes some memory of pain to be "modified" and the experience is remembered with the euphoria that is associated with an opiate high. The pain she does remember is the labor before the delivery. I am not going to get into an argument over what is more painful, just answering the question as to why women are willing to go through it more than once.

Supposedly the three most intense pain that the body produces are kidney stones, labor and migraines. Only labor pain is rewarded with the extreme dose of endorphins. I have passed a kidney stone and I had migraines for 45 years. The kidney stone was tough but it was easy compared to any one of my migraines. ( for a two year period I was having two to three migraines a week) There were several times that I sat on the bed with a shotgun in my mouth considering the only cure there was at that time. Obviously I never pulled the trigger but that was for the love of my family and not wanting them to feel the guilt and have to clean up after me. I have never heard of a single woman who was ready to kill herself over labor pains.

btw: many suicides are attributed to migraines - world wide.


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Excellent post PaulS.

I get a migraine when I read Diver's posts.

Thanks


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## Prepared One (Nov 5, 2014)

I think it's safe to say that if procreation depended on us guys passing a bowling ball through a tube the size of a straw we would be extinct by now. LOL. Not that there is a line of women lining up to have my babies, I think I will keep my bag of nuts As they were given to me when I was born, thank you very much.


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## topgun (Oct 2, 2013)

Nothing works quite as well for women's birth control as a simple Bayer Aspirin.

(If held firmly between the knees)


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## GTGallop (Nov 11, 2012)

I will say this... When I was all laid out for the world to see. Feet in the stirrups and nutz dangling in the cold air like dice on a dick shaped mirror, the doc whips out this giant needle and he says to me, "Here's the deal. I do the first one and show your wife how it works, then she does the second one."

He came this close to having a very unique story about how a giant hairy 270 pound naked man with impeccable man-scaping bare-handed him and stomped him into a greasy spot on the tile. And when you are large and hairy and they shave your nether regions you will - for about three weeks - look like the worlds most disgusting hair bagel on a stick.


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## jimb1972 (Nov 12, 2012)

topgun said:


> Nothing works quite as well for women's birth control as a simple Bayer Aspirin.
> 
> (If held firmly between the knees)


You can get around that by having her touch her toes.


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## Maine-Marine (Mar 7, 2014)

paraquack said:


> At the hospital where my worked, a Navy doctor moonlighting, did a vasectomy on a guy and somehow managed to nick his femoral artery. He kept on trying to put a couple of sutures in it (the guy is awake of course and see the blood spurting and then fortunately passed out) instead of calling for a surgeon. Unfortunately, the guy ended up bleeding out and died.
> I know this is an extremely rare incidence, but no thanks.


Rare - I would say non-existent... I would have to see documents to believe this... Look up Vasectomy Risks

Risks with vasectomy are few. *No death *has ever been attributed to this procedure.

Did you witness this or just hear about it...


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## TacticalCanuck (Aug 5, 2014)

the only birth control i need is a picture of Slippy in a thong bikini.


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## topgun (Oct 2, 2013)

I had many years of labor pain, but then I retired.


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## Prepared One (Nov 5, 2014)

TacticalCanuck said:


> the only birth control i need is a picture of Slippy in a thong bikini.


Well, I was going to get a good nights sleep tonight.


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## bigwheel (Sep 22, 2014)

I had a good message cooked up on all this stuff but is dissipated into thin air. When is the Jade Helm stuff fixing to start?


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

Did someone mention Slippy in a thong?! Did he send you guys some too?!!
SEXY, RIGHT?!!!


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## bigwheel (Sep 22, 2014)

I only got the one of him and the sheep. hmmm


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

bigwheel said:


> I only got the one of him and the sheep. hmmm


Lucky dog, you!!! Slippy in the bed of daisies was my favorite. I'll share if you will?!!


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Mish said:


> Lucky dog, you!!! Slippy in the bed of daisies was my favorite. I'll share if you will?!!





Mish said:


> Did someone mention Slippy in a thong?! Did he send you guys some too?!!
> SEXY, RIGHT?!!!





TacticalCanuck said:


> the only birth control i need is a picture of Slippy in a thong bikini.


Sitting on my front porch, drinking Chamomile Tea watching the sun rise over the hills east of Slippy Lodge wearing nothing but a red beret, I'm reminded of the things that make me smile...:abnormal:


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

Slippy, I want to thank you for that wonderful visual first thing in the morning. It made me smile. Then I thought about how it was probably quite chilli that early in the morning and that made me giggle. Hehe


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

Q. Why do women live longer.
A. Because they work less.
Oops.


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Mish said:


> Slippy, I want to thank you for that wonderful visual first thing in the morning. It made me smile. Then I thought about how it was probably quite chilli that early in the morning and that made me giggle. Hehe



View attachment 10913


Advice to the youngsters, warm mornings are best for nakedness...


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## Arklatex (May 24, 2014)

Advice noted. It's freakin cold out there in Bama! 60 degrees this am in Arkansas. Still a little chilly for naked coffee. Plus I don't think the coworkers would appreciate it. Thanks


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## Slippy (Nov 14, 2013)

Arklatex said:


> Advice noted. It's freakin cold out there in Bama! 60 degrees this am in Arkansas. Still a little chilly for naked coffee. Plus I don't think the coworkers would appreciate it. Thanks


Shhhh...I'm in the mountains this weekend. Don't tell the others.:icon_wink:


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## sargedog (Nov 12, 2012)

I have a couple of points on this subject. When my wife and I were first married we were 20 for me and 18 for her (too young). She was a little spoiled and after our daughter was about 2 she decided she was gonna move back to her mom's. Well I decided I didn't want to feel the way I did as to have my child away from me, so I went and had a vasectomy while she was away. After a few months she decided the grass wasn't as green somewhere else and came home. I didn't tell her about the surgery, and a while later my much younger brother let the cat out of the bag (and the fight was on). 

There are choices in life and I had made mine, that was 22 years ago and I have never been sorry. My wife is mostly glad I took matters into my own hands. She still would have liked to had 2 kids. It was the best $68 dollars I ever spent. She had the option to leave and have a 19 kids and counting kind of life, but not me, 1 was plenty.


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## TacticalCanuck (Aug 5, 2014)

There are other places to go. Just sayin. :stick::cupcake:


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

Maybe its a good idea to start stockpiling rubbers. They have many uses around the home, farm, or office. I had to after the last comments. But rubbers last five years? Rotate the stockpile from time to time. Call me crazy.


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## Mish (Nov 5, 2013)

James m said:


> Maybe its a good idea to start stockpiling rubbers. They have many uses around the home, farm, or office. I had to after the last comments. But rubbers last five years? Rotate the stockpile from time to time. Call me crazy.


I don't want to know what you use condoms for...just sayin


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## James m (Mar 11, 2014)

Yep. There's multiple uses for rubbers as well as tampons. Combine a tampon with petroleum jelly, inside a rubber to keep it dry.


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