# how to get my spouse on board?



## johnnyprepper (Nov 16, 2012)

hi everyone im new to the forums and prepping in general. ive been prepping for about 6 months now and ive narrowed down what im prepping for. my wife thinks im nuts but i keep telling her its better to be safe and prepared than sorry but it only seems to work good if theres things she enjoys. i dont look at it as far as conspericies go im more less prepping for natural disasters and economic calapse. i think of my self as trying to be self sufficent emergency preparedness thank you for the help:smile:


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## punch (Nov 6, 2012)

Howdy from Texas! Welcome to the forum.

punch


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## mwhartman (Jun 26, 2012)

Welcome! I suggest you both have a conversation about the things to took place in New Orleans after Katerina and what just took place with Sandy. Those images should get her thinking that preparing for the worst is not a waste of time and money.


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## Lucky Jim (Sep 2, 2012)

Tell your beloved that it's best to stock up now rather than try to do it after the rioting and looting starts..


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## mulle46 (Nov 9, 2012)

johnnyprepper said:


> hi everyone im new to the forums and prepping in general. ive been prepping for about 6 months now and ive narrowed down what im prepping for. my wife thinks im nuts but i keep telling her its better to be safe and prepared than sorry but it only seems to work good if theres things she enjoys. i dont look at it as far as conspericies go im more less prepping for natural disasters and economic calapse. i think of my self as trying to be self sufficent emergency preparedness thank you for the help:smile:


what things does she enjoy?what general area are you in, what natural disasters do you have to prepare for?


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## shotlady (Aug 30, 2012)

i was going to say turn on the news. lucky jim covered that market lol!
let her know its your job as a husband to prepare for her comfort and safety. if you are parents, its both your jobs to prepare for the survival and safety of the children. its good husbandry and parenting.


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## survival (Sep 26, 2011)

Jim, photo number 3 with the guy with the cart full of stella artois really knows his priorities don't he?

I agree with what the others have said and recommended, and one thing to note, go slooooow. Don't freak her out with a photo of the guy with the stella artois. Seriously, I've seen a HUGE increase in attitudes towards prepping here in the last year with a lot of people at least thinking about it.

A lot of preppers go out and buy a lot of preps right off, which is fine, but can also lead to a self inflicted financial disaster at the homefront which I have seen coworkers asking me for an advancement to get by to the next paycheck. Some even recommend to use all credit cards and run them all up so you don't have to pay for them when shtf. Great if your expecting shtf before your next billing cycle comes in, but terrible if nothing happens, thus ruining your life.

Good luck, and welcome to the forum.


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## Lucky Jim (Sep 2, 2012)

survival said:


> Jim, photo number 3 with the guy with the cart full of stella artois really knows his priorities don't he?


Yeah that raises an interesting point about what our personal priorities will be, I don't drink or smoke so won't have to waste time stocking up with booze and cigs. I also don't drive, so fuel doesn't interest me. Also I don't even have a gun, so ammo stocks are not on my list.
It's obvious what this dood's priorities are..-


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## WVTactics (Mar 26, 2012)

This is what I am going through as well and I am becoming more successful with this each and every day and this is some of the steps I take. I told her that I am what people call a prepper and I wanted her to help, I go the general answer like... "Why, do we really need all of this stuff??" So this is how I take this approach.

1. Find things she and yourself both enjoy stocking up on.
2. If she is looking for something that you have already in your bag or stored away tell her where it is and let her know that you had that stored for occasions like this.
3. Find things you know she is interested in and try to find away that what she is doing will help your preps.
4. Let her know that when SHTF happens you know she is good at certain things and keep her active in doing those things.

This is just some things I am trying to do just make it fun for her and she should come right along for the ride.


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## jimb1972 (Nov 12, 2012)

I keep quite a bit of booze on hand, I don't drink much but someone who does may have something I want.


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## Denton (Sep 18, 2012)

My house was already prepped for storms, earthquakes and Democrat presidents before we got married.
As I am always in the process of prepping and don't alter course because of anyone, she might as well go with it and help!


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## Lucky Jim (Sep 2, 2012)

These sickening true-life pics should convince any wifeys/girlfriends of the danger of going out when mobs are about.


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## insatiable ONE (Nov 9, 2012)

survival said:


> Jim, photo number 3 with the guy with the cart full of stella artois really knows his priorities don't he?


I tell you what he chose the wrong alcohol, he should have got all of the liquor he could carry.
In tough times it is better than gold. 
One of the best for barter, you can drink it ( I don't drink ), you can use it for an anti septic, pain killer, disinfectant, I'm sure a few that I missed also.

101 uses for alcohol.


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## Verteidiger (Nov 16, 2012)

Start by buying emergency supplies for power outages. Flashlights, batteries, bottled water, canned foods, items that lend comfort when a storm hits. She will be glad you did once it goes dark. Remind her that the Boy Scout motto is "Be prepared." Then explain your rationale for prepping, and how what you plan to purchase also has general purpose use value as well (toilet paper, hand wipes, etc.) and make sure you get items for her in the process -- so she feels involved in the decision making and planning process. Buy items that will be usable even if there is not an emergency -- canned tuna and canned chili serve as food either way. She will come around...my wife is now totally on board and feels safer now that we can withstand the grid going down. Build from there gradually.


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## Leon (Jan 30, 2012)

not prepping:

Prepping:


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## johnnyprepper (Nov 16, 2012)

WOW thank guys and i think i seen some girls ill have to try harder to get her prepping she imo is slowly coming around so maybe ill get her on board again thank you


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## preppermama (Aug 8, 2012)

shotlady said:


> i was going to say turn on the news. lucky jim covered that market lol!
> let her know its your job as a husband to prepare for her comfort and safety. if you are parents, its both your jobs to prepare for the survival and safety of the children. its good husbandry and parenting.


This is basically how I framed it to my husband.

My advice would be to take things slow. Don't just drop all this on her all at once. Prepping tends to freak spouses out if you don't go about it properly. I slowly eased my husband into prepping over the last 6 months. Don't just suddenly sit down and tell your wife suddenly that you think Canada is going to bomb us or an EMP is going to take down the grid on May 6th, 2013. That stuff will freak her out. Just talk basic economics and use the news as your backdrop. Then slowly start preparing your prepping space. I started just by picking up extra food each week, slowly building a library, etc.

My husband is all for prepping now, but not to the extreme. I have a closet in our house that's devoted to our prepping stuff and some space in the garage. That's it. My husband is fine with it as long as it doesn't turn into a hoarding situation where stuff has overtaken our house. I kind of agree with him actually.


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## Retronatrix (Nov 14, 2012)

Welcome, welcome, welcome! I had the same issue with my husband once I started to honestly study and look in to prepping. It took a while for me to assure him I'm not getting ready for some huge radical alien invasion or something, but rather common sense and emergency. All of a sudden he was laid off the day after the election and the first thing he saw me do was canning and drying food to put in to my stockpile. I think something clicked and now he's excited at all the info out there and how much he's learning.

Like mentioned before I think it's a mixture of finding something that interests the spouse as well as personal drive to provide. Odds are that once you sit down and talk with her in an honest heart to heart about how you want to provide for you family in case of emergencies she'll see the common sense of it.


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## lyz.grace (Nov 9, 2012)

.


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## mulle46 (Nov 9, 2012)

My wife got on board because of the storms we just had. We came to agreement about budget per month to prep. Our prep is more about natural disasters than anything else, but same principles apply.


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## wesley762 (Oct 23, 2012)

My wife has always been a borderline hoarder(That's been a challenge keeping in check), with that said I did not even bother telling her about prepping. She is just happy to start buying in bulk lol.


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## Lucky Jim (Sep 2, 2012)

Perhaps it's a psychological thing with some women, they probably can't bear to face the fact that the world might end, so they won't prep for it on the assumption that "Prepping for it might make it happen" if you see what I mean.
Sadly, it'll happen in one form or another whether we prep for it or not-


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## cannon (Nov 11, 2012)

I just shook my finger in my wife's face and said. Woman, we are going to be prepared for fire, earthquake and flood! I'm the man and I know what's best for you!" She looked at me meekly and said, "Yes dear."

Sometimes I just crack me up. 

In reality I already had an earthquake food stash when we met. So when I suggested we add a bunch more now that we live in a rural area she agreed.


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## Pir8fan (Nov 16, 2012)

Talk to her about stocking up in case neither one of you has a job for a while. That will at least get her thinking in the right direction.


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## Hardknocks24 (Nov 8, 2012)

Hey don't feel bad I'm family is against the whole ideal. But they want to be blind to all of it. Not me I'm prepping for all of us . If they want to stay the can not me . I now that's wrong when it comes down to it they will wish they had started . I started with 3 bags started all with same supply's excet for mine guns, ammo, swords , and a axe. Since ill be the work horse at camp. If not ill be on my own and set them up in the house for the bug in at first.


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## Retronatrix (Nov 14, 2012)

I'm gong to jump in and be Suzie Old-School Homemaker here with my opinions.......

As long as it's not making a problem with your relationship then I don't see why you just don't go ahead and reasonably prep, even if she might not fully understand or join in. I think it's only natural for a man to have the drive to protect and provide for his family and to me it would be a show of affection and care. I think women notice such things more than men realise.


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## johnnyprepper (Nov 16, 2012)

omgosh thank you so much for the tips i did get her to be 100% commited to food and water storage she says she has absolutely no problem with that so that is a plus and she has even bought and given me 10 large candles to help out soi think i got her moving in the right direction and she wants me to get more protection so thank you all of you for all the help it is finnally working for me i think alot helped when i showed her that alot of you are women thankyou ladies good luck ppl and peace be with you


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## mwhartman (Jun 26, 2012)

johnnyprepper said:


> omgosh thank you so much for the tips i did get her to be 100% commited to food and water storage she says she has absolutely no problem with that so that is a plus and she has even bought and given me 10 large candles to help out soi think i got her moving in the right direction and she wants me to get more protection so thank you all of you for all the help it is finnally working for me i think alot helped when i showed her that alot of you are women thankyou ladies good luck ppl and peace be with you


Great! The first step of the journey is often the most difficult but the most rewarding


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## preppermama (Aug 8, 2012)

insatiable ONE said:


> I tell you what he chose the wrong alcohol, he should have got all of the liquor he could carry.
> In tough times it is better than gold.
> One of the best for barter, you can drink it ( I don't drink ), you can use it for an anti septic, pain killer, disinfectant, I'm sure a few that I missed also.
> 
> 101 uses for alcohol.


I would focus on Whiskey myself. Whiskey numbs a toothache and body aches really well. It would be my painkiller of choice in a SHTF situation.


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## preppermama (Aug 8, 2012)

mulle46 said:


> My wife got on board because of the storms we just had. We came to agreement about budget per month to prep. Our prep is more about natural disasters than anything else, but same principles apply.


My husband did too. While our friends and family were out fighting the crowds for candles, propane, etc., it was business as usual in our household. I did go out and get the baby some extra milk, but that was it really.


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## mulle46 (Nov 9, 2012)

preppermama said:


> My husband did too. While our friends and family were out fighting the crowds for candles, propane, etc., it was business as usual in our household. I did go out and get the baby some extra milk, but that was it really.


thats one of my goals, to be like that. Not running around like a chicken with its head cut off, trying to get supplies last minute


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## ibewbull (Sep 1, 2012)

Explaining your concerns is a sensitive issue.
I like to refer to fire safety and wokplace safety plus first aid and CPR.
We all need to be educated the above for our own good.
I work in the construction business which has always been feast or famine. So putting up a store of canned goods and a freezer full of venison has always been comforting to us all at home.
The skills you need to run a household are invaulable as a survivalist also. Your skills are great barter material. 
I rotate my food stoicks as to keep the cans from going bad. Well most of them anyhow. Sometimes the dripping gooo takes its own path.
Having a generator to keep the house up and running in an ice storm is great to have on hand. Also in thunderstorms in summer. We have gone 3 days without power and no food stores were lost. We rotated the cord to each freezer and the fridge. 
The main issue was we had no 220 volts for the water pump. Luckly my wife had buckets on hand and used them for flushing. [ If its yellow let it mellow. If its brown flush it down.] We also had my inlaws close enough to get drinking water from or our neighbor who had his pump running. Not being in the city the " BUG OUT '' is of no concern. I bugged oput in 1976 when I left the east coast.
Check out writings by Mel Tappan a bit dated but aplicable today. The guns and gimmics are a bit more teckie now. 
Well that is all the wisdom I have to share for now. 
OH the doughnut in your car trunk , is this a prepper thing? It all depends on how you look at life.
If folks think Big Brother will take care of them well think again. The shelter in the old salt mines is for the chosen people. Politicians and rich folks. We won't be getting an invite to their party.
Check out Don Johnson in A Boy and His Dog. Just because it is funny.


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## Lattice (Nov 19, 2012)

I said it in another thread already. Any prep for any scenario can be linked to prepping for a layoff. 

So appeal to her sense of security in life. No not security from gangs looting. Security in making sure you two are fed. 

Sure you can put money away. But money only goes so far when the prices continue to go up. And what will allow you to survive not working longer. Having six months of rent, food, and gas money in the bank, or having the same amount of money in the bank along with six or twelve months of food in the house. And even more simple. A lot of people live paycheck to paycheck. If they miss a day of work the next week sucks. If you've prepped and planned it won't suck. 

Get her involved in it. Listen to her ideas, and don't discount them. Once she is involved she will likely want more.


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## Alaska (Nov 28, 2012)

mwhartman said:


> Welcome! I suggest you both have a conversation about the things to took place in New Orleans after Katerina and what just took place with Sandy. Those images should get her thinking that preparing for the worst is not a waste of time and money.


+1 current events are probably the best way do get anyone on board.
Here is an approach that can win you brownie points and gives you practice taking inventory

Go find 3-5 things that your lady likes or uses frequently. could be pack of smokes. a particular beauty product, maybe a food item. anyways find some of these and try to determine when the next time she may want/need that item. = then go purchase 1 or 2. Try to position your self so when she is ready to go buy it or what have you, you can walk out with that item in your hand and be the good guy = then you have the conversation basically explaining how crappy would it have been to run out of said product ,say, right in the middle of a winter storm where roads suck and power is out

Something like this usually appeals to a ladies common sense.
DO NOT chastise,berate or anything like that or you will lose her before you start.

It may not work first try around but getting "people on board" is a prep in and of its self. You cant prep for everythng all at once. But a steady march forward will add up before you know it.

Good luck. Stay positive.

-A


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## rob (Dec 5, 2012)

Johnnyprepper, I would recommend a slow aproach to cooping her. The first thing I start with are the same steps that are recommended by the DHS, a 72 hour survival kit, flashlight & batteries, battery powered radio etc. No matter how suspicious one is of preppers, these steps seem merely like responsible living, which by the way, prepping is all merely living responsibly. As this is getting done, before they begin to feel secure in their 72 hours worth of provisions is a good time to point out that after most disasters the disruption to the community is generally more than two weeks, and while they may want to add provisions if they must shelter in place we begin to discuss egress, which is the same as Bugging Out. Basically I start with the most basic things and add as the individual can maintain. I'll be honest. Because I am a retired Coast Guardsmen, and I have conducted disaster relief operations with a DART team, people at my church and around town may listen to me differently than they might to someone else, but your wife knows you. If you begin with the undeniable basics, and start adding to it in an orderly manner, she will likely start to roll with it. Another thing that worked with my spouse was rewarding compliments for minor steps done usually without thinking toward preparedness. If she accidently purchases a few extra cans of food, I thank her for pitching in and add the cans to our short term Armegadon box. The word picture can help if she is on the fence. Ask her if you two lived in New Jersey and you were still without power or utilities since Hurricane Sandy went through over a month ago, how well the two of you would be doing? Would you have had a place to retreat, or bug out, to? If not what would she imagine would be your water supply, or food supply? Let her tell you what plan she feels is appropriate, there is a high probability that she will tell you that you two have a need to maintain some bottled water and canned goods. These are a few things that can get her rolling. Keep it basic at first, then add to that.


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## countdown (Dec 10, 2012)

Great thread! My wife isn't completely against the idea, and actually sees the benefit, I just have to keep myself from going overboard and keep big-ticket items under the radar. I guess I need to start going along when she goes grocery shopping...


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## shadownmss (Nov 13, 2012)

Just start off slow and prep things that make sense. Don't show up with a car load of guns and ammo and a pallet of freeze dried food


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## Lucky Jim (Sep 2, 2012)

_"*It's a dangerous business going out your door*"- Bilbo Baggins_
Here's another example of why wifey should stock up with stuff BEFORE it hits the fan, so she won't have to break through anti-riot police cordons to reach the supermarket...

_(Brazilian cops breaking up a farmers protest)_


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